Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph provides information on the number of candidents participanted for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia between 2000 and 2020.

In 2000, the highest figure was recorded for the film club, at around 65 members. This is followed by about 35 and 25 were in the martial arts and amateur dramatics, respectively. However, there was no candidents in musical performances. After five years, the number of participants in amateur dramatics fell slightly from approximately 35 to 30, while the figure of musical performances remained unchanged.

In 2010, the number of candidents in amateur dramatics and table tennis reached at the same level, around 20. After that, the figure of table tennis rose dramatically from about 20 to 35, while in terms of musical performance, the number of participants grew significanty between 10 to 15. By the end of the period, the film cub had the gretest figure, whereas amateur dramatics dropped to its lowest point, at around 5.

Overall, the number of participants in martial arts flunctuated over the period, while the film club displayed almost stable figure in all years. the figures of table tennis and musical performances rose and reached a peak of its total by the end of the years.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers the main features of the graph, including the trends for different activities. You successfully identified the highest and lowest points and made relevant comparisons between categories. However, the analysis is slightly hampered by inaccuracies in data reporting. For example, you mention musical performances remained unchanged in the first five years, but the graph shows a slight increase. Additionally, some descriptions of trends are vague, such as 'grew significantly between 10 to 15'. To reach a higher band, ensure that data points are cited with greater precision and that the overview clearly highlights the most significant trends across the entire period rather than just listing individual changes.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and an overview. You use some cohesive devices such as 'In 2000', 'However', and 'By the end of the period' to guide the reader. However, the progression of ideas is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel forced. For instance, the transition between the second and third paragraphs could be smoother. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear, particularly when discussing multiple activities in one sentence. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear thematic focus would enhance the overall flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuated', 'dramatically', and 'reached a peak'. However, there are several spelling errors, such as 'candidents' (candidates), 'significanty' (significantly), 'flunctuated' (fluctuated), and 'gretest' (greatest). These errors are noticeable and detract from the professional tone of the report. Furthermore, some word choices are slightly unnatural, such as 'the figure of musical performances' or 'reached at the same level'. To improve, focus on mastering the spelling of common academic terms and refining your collocations to ensure more precise and natural expression.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt to use complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'the number of candidents participanted' (should be 'participating') and 'the film cub had the gretest figure' (missing 'the' before 'film club'). There are also issues with subject-verb agreement and preposition usage, such as 'reached at the same level'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy and ensuring consistent verb tense usage would significantly improve your writing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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