Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-25
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The given line graph illustrates about the number of competitors in the recreation centre of various activities from the last 20 year in Melbourne, Australia from 2000 to 2020.
Overall, the number of participants in the film club had skyrocketed since the year 2000 to 2020. Whereas the number of people participating in martial arts had showed a declined trend over the last 2 decades.
To begin with, the number of people participated in film club and martial activities had showed significant increased from the last twenty years which rose upto nearly 40 and 65 respectively. Subsequently, the number of musical performances partcipants had showed no interest for 5 years but afterwards the number surged approximately 20.
Moving forward, the remaining two recreational activities such as table tennis and amateur dramatics showed fluctuated data throughout the 20 years. In which table tennis partcipants had showed substantial rise nearly 5o whereas amateur dramatics partcipants showed fall upto almost
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to cover the main features of the graph, but the analysis is significantly hampered by inaccurate reporting of data. For instance, you state that martial arts showed a 'declined trend', yet the graph shows an upward trajectory. Furthermore, the description of the data is often vague or incomplete, such as the final sentence which cuts off mid-thought. While you identify some trends, the lack of precision in reading the graph and the failure to complete the summary prevent a higher score. To improve, ensure you carefully verify the data points against the axes and provide a complete, coherent overview of all categories presented.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the logical progression is frequently disrupted by inaccurate reporting and confusing transitions. While you use cohesive devices like 'Overall', 'To begin with', and 'Moving forward', the internal logic of the sentences is often flawed. For example, the transition 'Subsequently' is used to introduce musical performances, but the connection to the previous point is weak. Additionally, the final paragraph is incomplete, which breaks the flow of the response. Improving the clarity of your comparisons and ensuring every sentence is finished will significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
Your vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive, relying heavily on basic phrasing such as 'showed a... trend' or 'number of people'. There are also several instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'illustrates about' (the verb 'illustrate' does not take 'about') and 'fluctuated data' (data does not fluctuate; the trends do). Spelling errors, such as 'partcipants' and 'upto', also occur. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of verbs to describe trends (e.g., 'soared', 'plummeted', 'stabilised') and ensure you are using precise terminology for graph analysis.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex structures, but these are marred by frequent grammatical errors. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'martial arts had showed a declined trend'), incorrect tense usage, and missing articles. The sentence structure is often clunky, and the final sentence is a fragment, which is a significant error. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar and punctuation limits the score. Focus on mastering subject-verb agreement and ensuring that your sentences are complete, with a clear subject and predicate.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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