Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-25
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
the graph show the information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social center in melbourne ,australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
the number of film club participants are 2000 in 60 to 62 percent and increasing by68 percent in 2020.
the participants of martial arts are start from the almost 35 percent in 2000 but the graph shows its ups and down but in last in 2020 its still almost 35 percent.
a amateur dramatics it started in 2000 for thr the 28,27 percent and still 2005 are the same number show but the next year its almost falling very fast it drains almost upto 4 to 5 percent in 2005.
and the table tennis show the numbers of participants are almost in 2000 in 18 to 19 percent but the years go it shows the still numbers of participants are the same percentage in 2010 but it increasing by very fast it goes to almost 40 percent in 2015 and its speed continue for the next 5 year . in 2020 its acctully participants are upto n55 percent.
the number of musical performances is zero on the start but in 2005 was the year they grow up to 0 percent and till 2020 grew up to almost 15 percent.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to cover the main features of the graph, but the information is often inaccurate or confusingly presented. For example, the description of 'amateur dramatics' is difficult to follow due to unclear figures and poor data interpretation. While you have identified some trends, the lack of a clear overview and the inclusion of inaccurate data points (such as stating musical performances started at zero and grew to zero) prevent a higher score. To improve, ensure you provide a clear summary of the overall trends in the introduction or as a separate paragraph and double-check the data points against the graph.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the logical progression of ideas is weak. The use of cohesive devices is very limited and often repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'and' or 'in 2020'. The referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison between different activities. To improve, use a wider range of linking words (e.g., 'however', 'in contrast', 'subsequently') to connect your sentences and ensure that each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the data to improve the overall flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is quite basic and repetitive, often relying on simple verbs like 'show', 'start', and 'go'. There are also several errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'acctully' instead of 'actually' and 'drains' used inappropriately to describe a decline in numbers. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to demonstrate the precision required for Academic Task 1. You should focus on learning specific terminology for describing trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', 'peaked', and 'experienced a sharp decline'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('the number of film club participants are') and incorrect tense usage ('the table tennis show the numbers'). Sentence structures are mostly simple, and there is a lack of complex sentences. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing capital letters and incorrect comma usage. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and subject-verb agreement. Practice using complex structures like relative clauses or subordinating conjunctions to add variety to your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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