Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the number of people that had participated for different activities at social centre in Melbourne, Australia from 2000 to 2020.

Overall, the film club had the highest number in the beginning, remained at the same position in the end. While the musical performances had the lowest figures among five categories, showed significant growth over the period.

The film club had the largest number in 2000 among five activities at around 65 number of participants, decreased to 60 number in 2010 before increasing to 68 number, it still remained at the highest position. n contrast, the musical performances had the lowest value at nearly 1 number in 2005, experienced significant increase, increasing to just below 20 number of participants.

The amateur dramatics showed considerable decline, increasing from 25 number to 30 number in 2005 before decreasing significantly to just below 10 number of participants. While the table tennis experienced dramatical incline, increasing from 15 number to just above 50 number, surpassing the amateur dramatics in 2010 and became the second highest number of participants in 2020. The martial arts experienced fluctuation, fluctuating between 35 number to 40 number over the period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers all key features of the graph, including the trends for all five activities. You successfully identified the highest and lowest points and made relevant comparisons, such as noting that table tennis surpassed amateur dramatics. However, the report lacks precision in data reporting. For instance, you frequently use the phrase 'number of participants' incorrectly after a figure (e.g., '65 number of participants'), which makes the data reporting awkward. To improve, ensure you focus on the trends and use accurate units of measurement consistently. The overview is clear and provides a good summary of the main movements.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs focusing on specific trends. You use some cohesive devices like 'In contrast' and 'While' to link ideas. However, the flow is occasionally hindered by repetitive sentence structures and some mechanical transitions. For example, the transition between the amateur dramatics and table tennis sections could be smoother. The paragraphing is appropriate, but the internal cohesion within paragraphs could be improved by varying the way you introduce data points to avoid a list-like feel.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'significant growth,' 'considerable decline,' and 'surpassing.' However, there are persistent errors in word choice and collocation. The repeated use of 'number' as a noun modifier (e.g., '65 number,' '20 number') is incorrect and unnatural. Additionally, you used 'dramatical incline,' which is not standard English; 'dramatic increase' or 'sharp rise' would be more appropriate. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding the repetitive use of the same nouns to describe figures.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You show a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as using 'While' and 'before' to combine clauses. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that affect the clarity of your writing. Examples include 'the number of people that had participated for different activities' (should be 'participating in'), and 'the amateur dramatics showed considerable decline, increasing from 25 number to 30 number' (the logic here is contradictory). There are also issues with article usage and prepositional phrases. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to limit the score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.