Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-27
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line graph presents the data related to the numbers of participants in different activities such as film club, martial arts, amateur dramatics, table tennis and musical performances at one social and cultural centre in Melbourne, Australia from 2000 to 2020.
Overall, there is a lot of fluctuations in the number of participants across many activities, but there is not much variation in film club activity.
Let start from Martial Arts, Initially the participants was around 36 in 2000. In 2005 it dropped near to 30 but in 2010 it jumped near to 40 and after another fluctuation it stayed at 36 in 2020. Amateur dramatics started from approximately 26 participants and increased near to 30 in 2005, afterwards number constantly decreased to lower than 10 in 2020. Table tennis, were at 16 in 2000. It increased to 20 in 2005, and stayed relatively constant till 2010. Subsequently, the number increased significantly and reached between 50 and 60 in 2020.
Musical performances were started in 2005 but participants were 0 at that time. Then it increased constantly and reached near to 20 in 2020. Apart from all activities, film club were at the highest number of people in 2000, which was around 65. through the time it stayed stable with marginal changes in the number of participants. It pointed at little bit higher at around 66 in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response covers all key features of the graph, including the trends for each activity. You have successfully identified the main trends, such as the stability of the film club and the significant growth of table tennis. However, the overview is slightly weak; while it mentions fluctuations, it could be more analytical by highlighting the most significant changes or the final ranking of activities. The data reporting is generally accurate, though some descriptions, such as 'near to 30' or 'between 50 and 60', are slightly imprecise. To reach a higher band, ensure that the overview provides a clearer summary of the most striking differences between the categories over the twenty-year period.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs focusing on specific activities. The progression of ideas is clear. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive (e.g., 'In 2005', 'In 2010', 'In 2020'). There is a lack of sophisticated linking words to connect sentences and ideas more fluidly. For instance, the transition between the description of martial arts and amateur dramatics is abrupt. Improving the variety of cohesive devices and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the overall flow and coherence of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You have used a sufficient range of vocabulary to describe the data, such as 'fluctuations', 'increased significantly', and 'marginal changes'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'Musical performances were started' (should be 'began') and 'It pointed at little bit higher' (which is awkward phrasing). The vocabulary is generally functional but lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands. To improve, focus on using more precise verbs and adverbs to describe trends, such as 'experienced a steady decline' or 'remained relatively stable', and avoid informal phrasing like 'little bit'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement and article usage (e.g., 'the participants was around 36', 'film club were at the highest'). There are also punctuation issues, such as the comma splice in 'Table tennis, were at 16'. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. To improve, pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement and ensure that your sentence structures are grammatically sound, especially when dealing with plural and singular nouns.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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