Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-27
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
As the graph below shows the numbers of participants for different activities at one social center in Melbourne, Australia for the periods 2000 to 2020.
The number of participants of film club from the period of 2000 to 2020 remain about 65. Conversely to it the number of participants of amateur dramatics from 2000 to 2020 gradually decreases like 25 to 9. Furthermore the number of participants of marital arts in 2000 was 35 conversely to it amateur dramatic was 25. Following this in 2005 they both have round about 30 to 35 number of people, in 2020 the number of participants of amateur dramatics reduces to 5 and the participants of martial arts remains the same,
Whereas the the number of participants of table tennis gradually increases from 2002 to 15 to 55. Following this the number of participants of musical performances increases from 0 to 15 in 2005 to 2020.
Overall the number of participants table tennis coincide in 2010 with amateur dramatics and in 2015 with musical performances.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers the main features of the graph, but the analysis is inconsistent and contains several inaccuracies regarding the data. For instance, the claim that film club participants remained at 65 is not supported by the visual data, and the description of martial arts and amateur dramatics is confusing and occasionally contradictory. While you have attempted to report on all categories, the lack of precision in interpreting the trends and the failure to provide a clear, accurate overview of the data mean that the response does not fully address the requirements of the task. To improve, focus on accurately identifying the starting and ending points and describing the overall trends clearly.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is organised into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused, such as the repetitive and awkward use of 'conversely to it' and 'following this'. The transition between ideas is frequently abrupt, making it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison of trends. The final paragraph is particularly disjointed, as it attempts to summarise but introduces specific data points that were not clearly explained previously. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear focus would significantly enhance the flow of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, relying heavily on basic phrases like 'number of participants' and 'increases'. There are also errors in word choice, such as 'marital arts' (instead of 'martial arts') and 'coincide' (used incorrectly to describe data points crossing). The range of vocabulary is insufficient to convey the trends with precision. To reach a higher band, you should incorporate a wider variety of verbs and adverbs to describe trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'plummeted', 'surged', or 'remained stable', and ensure that technical terms are spelled correctly.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'number of participants... remain'), incorrect preposition usage, and awkward sentence structures. The opening sentence is a fragment rather than a complete sentence. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, they are often faulty, leading to confusion. You need to focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring that every sentence has a clear subject and verb, and work on consistent tense usage when describing historical data.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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