Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The give graph track information about the numbers of various activities participants held at Melbourne, Australia in a social centre between 2000 and 2020.

Overall, film club remained at the top of the graph throughout the given time. While, amateur dramatics witnessed dramatic downfall. Martial arts had minimal fluctuations during whole time period. Whereas, table tennis peaked after slight drop.

At a first glance, film club was the most prominent activity from all activity, with 65 participants in 2000 and remain almost plateaued until year 2020. Similarly martial arts in 2000 at 35 showed same trend with slightly fluctuations. However, amateur dramatics rose marginally to 29 participants in 2005, but seen downfall up to 5 participants in 2020.

Table tennis showed upward trend as well, 15 participants in year 2000 and slightly went

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the ability to fully develop the response. While you have identified the main trends, the description is incomplete as the final sentence is cut off mid-thought. To improve, ensure you provide a comprehensive overview of all data points and complete your analysis. The lack of a conclusion and the unfinished sentence mean that the task is only partially addressed. Aim to provide a more detailed breakdown of the data to ensure all key features are covered thoroughly.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally awkward, such as 'While, amateur dramatics witnessed...' and 'At a first glance'. The progression of ideas is interrupted by the incomplete final sentence, which hinders the overall flow. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next. Improving the logical flow between sentences will help achieve a higher band score.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks sophistication. You use some relevant terms like 'fluctuations', 'prominent', and 'plateaued', but there are also errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'give graph track information' (should be 'given graph tracks') and 'held at Melbourne' (should be 'held in Melbourne'). The vocabulary is somewhat repetitive, and the errors occasionally draw attention to themselves. Expanding your range of descriptive verbs and adverbs would help to convey the data more precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including issues with articles ('the give graph'), verb tense consistency ('remain almost plateaued'), and sentence structure. The incomplete sentence at the end is a major issue. While you attempt some complex structures, they are often marred by errors in syntax or word form. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction and subject-verb agreement. Proofreading for common errors like missing articles and incorrect verb forms will significantly improve the clarity and accuracy of your writing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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