Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph below illustrarte the information on the numbers of participants for multiple activities at same social point in Melbourne,Australia for the period 2000 t0 2020.

overall, the multiple activities at one social mediafluctuate in form of different trends between 2000 to 2020.

Here, The 70 particepents of film clube were on highest activities between 2000 t0 2020. in contrast the lowest activity of musical performance were recorded between 2005 to 2020 which fluctuate from 0 to15. while tabel tennis activities were gradually increase from 2010 to 2020, that start from 15 participant and goes to 50 participant ,before that thsese activities on Melbourne, Australia were stable. highly changed were saw in Amateur dramatics that were decreased from 25 paricepnt to 5 participants .

all the activities were gradually increase or decreased but majoor changed were seen in amarture dramatics and table teniss.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which negatively impacts the score. While you have identified some main features, such as the film club's popularity and the decline in amateur dramatics, the analysis is somewhat superficial. You have not fully utilised the data provided, and the overview is quite brief. To improve, ensure you provide a more comprehensive summary of the trends and make clearer comparisons between the different activities. The under-length penalty is applied here as the response is 143 words, failing to reach the required threshold.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into short paragraphs, but the logical flow is hindered by repetitive phrasing and a lack of sophisticated cohesive devices. While you use some transition words like 'overall' and 'in contrast', the connections between sentences are often mechanical or unclear. For instance, the transition between the discussion of the film club and musical performances feels abrupt. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus to guide the reader through your analysis more effectively.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and contains several spelling errors, such as 'illustrarte', 'particepents', 'clube', and 'amarture'. You rely on basic descriptors like 'highest' and 'lowest', which restricts the precision of your report. There is also some confusion in word choice, such as referring to the social centre as a 'social media' or 'social point'. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more precise vocabulary related to data trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a significant decline', and ensure accurate spelling throughout your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('all the activities were gradually increase') and tense consistency. Sentence structures are generally simple, and there are errors in punctuation and capitalization, such as the inconsistent use of 'Melbourne,Australia'. The lack of control over complex sentence structures makes the writing feel disjointed. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like missing articles and incorrect verb forms. Increasing the variety of sentence structures will also help improve your overall grammatical range.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.