Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the number of participants for five different activities such as film club, martial arts, amateur dramatics, table tennis and musical performances at one social centre in melbourne, australia in between 2000 and 2020.
Overall, it is clear that, film club and martial arts had realtively stable participants in initial and last year. Consequently, the number of participants in table ameture dramtics declined after 2005. However, table tennis and musical performances witnessed considerably similar trends with each other throughout the given period.
In detail, in the beginning of the year, the film club had nearly 65 participants, while this figure reamin realtively stable among all the years.
Though, the number of participants in martial arts flactuated through out the given years, the figure stood at 35% in 2000 and 2020.
Furthermore, the number of participants in amateur dramactis was 25% in the year 2000, the number plummeted drastically after the year 2005 and reached at 5% over the two decades. By contrast, table tennis and musical performance considerably shows similar trends. In 2000, table tennis had 15 participants in the 2000, however, this figure rose to 55
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers the main features of the graph, but it is incomplete as the final sentence cuts off abruptly. While you identify key trends, the data reporting is inconsistent. For instance, you use percentages (e.g., '35%') when the graph refers to the number of participants, which is a significant inaccuracy. Furthermore, the description of the trends for table tennis and musical performances is left unfinished, preventing a full summary of the data. To improve, ensure all data points are accurately transcribed from the graph and that your conclusion or final comparisons are fully articulated rather than left incomplete.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'In detail', and 'By contrast' to signal shifts in your argument. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by the abrupt ending of the text. Additionally, some transitions feel slightly mechanical or forced. To reach a higher band, focus on ensuring that each paragraph flows logically into the next and that your concluding summary is fully developed rather than trailing off, which disrupts the overall coherence of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuated', 'plummeted', and 'stable'. However, there are several spelling errors, such as 'realtively', 'ameture', 'dramactis', and 'flactuated'. Additionally, the word choice is sometimes imprecise, such as using 'in the beginning of the year' when referring to a period of time, or using percentages instead of raw numbers. To improve, focus on proofreading for spelling accuracy and ensure that the vocabulary used is appropriate for describing statistical data, specifically distinguishing between counts and percentages.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'in between 2000 and 2020' (redundant preposition), 'table tennis and musical performances witnessed considerably similar trends with each other' (awkward phrasing), and 'reached at 5%' (incorrect preposition). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of prepositions when describing data trends. Reviewing basic sentence construction will help reduce the frequency of these errors.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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