Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-04
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph illustrates the number of participants for various activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for a time period between 2000 to 2020.
Overall, maximum participants participated in film club and lowest participants musical performances but at the end of 2020 amateur dramatics felled to lowest,no musical participants in 2000,and martial arts maintained participants every year.
In 200, no one participate in musical performances, and slightly it straight in 2006 0 to increased year by year at end 18 members participate,while table tennis started with 18 participants in 2000 and turned to a second maximum participants in Melbourne approx 52 in 2000,also amateur dramatics begin with 26 participants at early and stage and it felled to end with only 7 or 6 participants.
However, film club remained unchanged it increased 70 to 75 in this period, martial arts opend with 38 participants at early stage and felled to 32 in middle again raised and again felled and finally in 2020 it remained unchanged same participants in 2020 .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers all parts of the task by identifying main trends and making comparisons. However, the reporting of data is often inaccurate or confusing. For example, stating that 'maximum participants participated in film club' is a valid observation, but the description of the data for musical performances and amateur dramatics is imprecise and difficult to follow. The overview is present but lacks clarity due to grammatical issues. To improve, ensure that data points are cited accurately and that the summary highlights the most significant trends rather than listing individual fluctuations, which makes the response feel like a collection of disjointed observations rather than a cohesive summary.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused, such as the repetitive use of 'and' and 'while' to connect unrelated clauses. The transition between sentences is frequently abrupt, making it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison of trends over time. Referencing is also unclear in places, particularly when describing the fluctuations of martial arts. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'in contrast', 'subsequently', 'meanwhile') and ensure that each paragraph has a clear thematic focus.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. There are several instances of word-choice errors, such as 'felled' (used instead of 'fell' or 'declined') and 'at early and stage'. The student relies on basic verbs like 'increased' and 'participate' throughout the text. While the meaning is generally conveyed, the lack of precision and the frequent misuse of terminology (e.g., 'second maximum participants') hinder the overall quality. To reach a higher band, you should incorporate more precise vocabulary related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', 'peaked', or 'experienced a downward trend'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with verb tense consistency (e.g., 'no one participate' instead of 'participated'), incorrect word forms ('felled' instead of 'fell'), and sentence structure. Many sentences are run-on or lack necessary punctuation, such as the second paragraph which is a long, fragmented list of data points. There is a lack of complex sentence structures, and the simple sentences used often contain errors in subject-verb agreement. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for tense consistency would significantly improve the clarity of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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