Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-07
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The provided line chart illustrates the numerical date of participants for different activities at a social centre in Melbourne, Australia during 2000 to 2020. There were five activities involved: film club, martial arts, amateur dramatics, table tennis and musical performances.
Through out the period of time, around 70 individuals participated. Film club filled with the most contestants throughout the 20 years. On contrary, music performance wasn't a part of activities till 2005. After then, it reported slight increment reaching around 10 participants in 2010. Then for upcoming 10 years it didn't reported much improvements , reaching nearly 20 participants till 2020.
Number of participants stood nearly stable in martial arts, including around 35 participants with the pike of 40 individuals in 2010 and less participant around 30 in 2005 & 2015. Individuals prefered amateur dramatics was similar in 2000 & 2005 with nearly 30 participants. Afterwards, drastically dropped with around 5 people till 2020. On contrary, in table tennis had more participants then 2000 in 2005, with 20 people and stood the same in 2010 also. After then it reached to top around 55 participants in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all parts of the task and identifies key trends, such as the dominance of the film club and the growth of table tennis. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. For example, the description of martial arts as 'stable' is inaccurate given the fluctuations mentioned, and the overview is missing a clear summary of the most significant trends. The data reporting is occasionally imprecise, such as the vague reference to 'around 70 individuals' which does not clearly represent the graph's total or specific activity trends. To improve, ensure that comparisons are more explicit and that the overview highlights the most striking features of the data rather than just listing details.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the information. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'After then' and 'On contrary' are used incorrectly or awkwardly. The progression of ideas within paragraphs is sometimes disjointed, particularly in the third paragraph where the transition between different activities feels abrupt. While there is a logical attempt to group the data, the lack of sophisticated linking words makes the flow feel somewhat stilted. Improving the variety and accuracy of transition signals would significantly enhance the coherence of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there are several instances of word-choice errors and unnatural collocations. Examples include 'numerical date' instead of 'numerical data', 'filled with the most contestants' instead of 'had the highest number of participants', and 'pike' instead of 'peak'. These errors occasionally distract the reader. While the student attempts to use a range of vocabulary, the lack of precision in these choices limits the score. Focusing on accurate collocations related to data description—such as 'upward trend', 'fluctuated', or 'reached a peak'—would be beneficial.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but grammatical errors are frequent. There are issues with verb tense consistency ('didn't reported', 'prefered'), missing articles, and awkward phrasing ('music performance wasn't a part of activities'). Subject-verb agreement is also inconsistent. While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors in basic grammar and sentence construction prevent the response from reaching a higher band. To improve, the student should focus on proofreading for tense consistency and ensuring that articles and prepositions are used correctly in descriptive writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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