Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-11
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph below illustrates the information on the numbers of participants for different activities held at one social center in Melbourne, Australia for the 20-year period from 2000 to 2020.
Overall, the film club and martial arts are the only one which stands almost stable for the entire time period. However, table tennis had experienced a great growth over the timeline. But, amateur dramatics experienced downfall at social center.
First, the film club has achieved a fantastic growth over the timeline and it has 1st highest number of members but, it also have some ups and downs at social center. Secondly, table tennis has the 2nd highest number of players. Although, it had not a great start but over the time and it has dramatic rise of players in its teams. Thirdly, martial arts has 3rd highest number of competitors on that center.
On the other hand, the amateur dramatics had a good start but unfortunately, it started a continuous downfall in year 2005 and lasts till year 2020. At last, initially the musical instruments also has zero attendees till the year 2005 but then it the number of attendees started increasing.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, but the analysis is inconsistent and contains factual inaccuracies. For example, you state the film club remained 'almost stable' in the overview, but then describe it as having 'fantastic growth' in the body paragraph. Furthermore, the description of the trends is often contradictory or vague, such as claiming the film club had 'some ups and downs' without specifying the data points. To improve, ensure your overview accurately reflects the most significant trends and that your body paragraphs provide specific data comparisons rather than general, sometimes inaccurate, descriptions of the movements.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused. For instance, the transition 'On the other hand' is used to introduce the amateur dramatics, but the preceding paragraph did not establish a clear contrast that justifies this connector. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear, such as 'it has 1st highest number', which lacks a clear subject. Improving the flow between sentences and using a wider variety of linking words more naturally would enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision required for a higher band. You rely on repetitive phrasing like 'over the timeline' and 'at social center'. There are also instances of awkward word choices, such as 'experienced downfall' instead of 'experienced a decline' and 'competitors' to describe participants in a social club. To achieve a higher score, try to use more precise collocations related to data description, such as 'a steady increase', 'a significant drop', or 'fluctuated', and avoid repeating the same phrases throughout the response.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('it also have', 'it the number of attendees started'), article usage ('at social center'), and tense inconsistencies. For example, 'it had not a great start' is grammatically incorrect; it should be 'it did not have a great start'. While the meaning is generally understandable, these recurring errors limit the score. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would be highly beneficial.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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