Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-11
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the number of participants in different activities such as film club, martial arts, amateur dramatics, table tennis and musical performances at one social event in Melbourne, Australia between the period of 2000 to 2020.
First of all, the film club had 64 participants in 2000 whereas musical performance had not a single member in same year which shows the weakest point in the whole journey of musicians.From 2000 to 2020 the film club members are fluctuating and there is no change in number of participants till 2020, in contrast musical participants had zero members till 2005, then their members gradually increased for next 15 years with 19 participants in 2020.
Secondly, martial arts participants fluctuates from 2000 to 2020 and 39 participants are contributed as highest point in 2010.
Moreover, table tennis players had significant upward change from 2010 to 2020 as there were only 20 participants in 2010 but in 2020 it increases to 55 members, whereas amateur dramatics participants has diminished ratio from 2005 onwards and peak point in 2020 where 8 members took part in the activity.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all the activities mentioned in the graph and attempts to make comparisons. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial and contains inaccuracies. For instance, you state the film club had 'no change' in the number of participants until 2020, which contradicts the visual data showing fluctuations. Additionally, the description of the amateur dramatics trend is confusing, as you mention a 'diminished ratio' but then refer to a 'peak point in 2020' where the number is actually at its lowest. To reach a higher band, ensure that your data reporting is precise and that you clearly identify the most significant trends rather than just listing individual data points.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices such as 'First of all', 'In contrast', and 'Moreover'. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes disjointed, and the use of cohesive devices can feel mechanical. The referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the transition between the film club and musical performances is abrupt. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus that flows logically into the next.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuating', 'diminished', and 'participants'. However, there are some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'weakest point in the whole journey' and '39 participants are contributed as highest point'. These phrasing issues occasionally make the text sound unnatural. To improve, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and ensure that your word choices are appropriate for describing statistical trends rather than narrative descriptions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. Examples include 'musical performance had not a single member' (missing article), 'participants fluctuates' (subject-verb agreement error), and 'it increases to 55 members' (tense inconsistency). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to lower the score. You should work on subject-verb agreement, consistent use of past tense for historical data, and the correct use of articles to improve the overall accuracy of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.
