Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-17
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.0)
the line graph illustrate on tehnumber of paticipants for different activites such as the activites film club , martial arts, amateur dramtics , table tennis, and musical performances. at the social centre in melbourne, australia for the period in 2000 to 2020.
it is apperants that, in particular, an increase of 65 number of participants was noticed in the profit of 2000. there was a film club and martial arts was increased in 2005 but however the amateur dramatics was was increased in 2000 to 2005 but the decreased pointed in 2020, although the table tennis was increased in 2000 but the decreased point in 2021. it will be highly increased in 2020 its was a peak point in table tennis. and the musical performance was started point is to low in 2005 but its will be incresed in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response makes an attempt to summarise the graph by mentioning most of the activities, such as the film club, martial arts, amateur dramatics, table tennis, and musical performances. However, the student fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, coming in at 140 words, which negatively impacts task completion. Furthermore, the data description is extremely confusing, inaccurate, and hard to follow, such as claiming that 'an increase of 65 number of participants was noticed in the profit of 2000' and mentioning a non-existent year like 2021. The overview is poorly formulated and fails to clearly highlight the main overall trends.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The text suffers from severe organizational issues. It is written in just two block paragraphs, with the second paragraph running on as a single, disorganised run-on sentence containing multiple contradictory ideas. Cohesive devices are misused or entirely absent, leading to a lack of logical progression. Referencing is frequently unclear (e.g., pronouns like 'its' and 'it' are used ambiguously), and the flow of information is severely disrupted by basic punctuation errors and missing capitalisation throughout the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The vocabulary used is extremely basic and repetitive, with frequent word-choice errors that impede communication (e.g., using 'profit' instead of 'period' or 'number', and 'decreased pointed'). There are numerous spelling mistakes ('apperants', 'incresed', 'dramtics', 'paticipants'), and the student is unable to use less common lexical items accurately. The range of vocabulary is strictly limited to what is immediately prompted by the task rubric.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
Grammatical control is weak throughout the response. The text is plagued by sentence structure errors, such as fragments, run-on sentences, and faulty passive constructions ('the decreased pointed in 2020'). Tenses are mixed up inappropriately when describing past data ('its will be incresed in 2020'). There is an almost complete absence of correct punctuation, and capitalization rules are ignored entirely at the beginning of sentences and proper nouns. Simple structures are unreliable, and attempts at complex sentences fail.
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