Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-27
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
the line graph shows the number of people who participated in five diffrent activities at a social centre in melbourne australia between 2000 to 2020
overall the film club remained the most popular activity throughout the period. in contrast participation in amateur dramatics decreased constatly. table tennis showed the biggest increase on yhe same time material arts changed only libble bit . musical perfomance also became more popular after 2005 .
in 2000 around 64 people attended the film club and maked it popular activity. this figure suddenly goes down to 60 in 2010 . before rise to approx 66 in 2020. the number of people doing material arts was about 36 in 2010 and 35 in 2005 so its decresed in 2005 to only 1 and then increased in 2010 to 38 and also decrease to 36 in 2020
amateuur dramatics started at approx 26 participants in 2000 and increase to 28 in 2005 and in ending to 20202 its only reaching out 6 peoples.
table tennis increased from 16 participants in 2000 around 20 in 2005 and 2010. and then increaed to 36 in 2015 and than 54 in 2020
in last musical performance has no participant in 2000 and 2005 but it seems likes increased in 2020 by 18.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The student covers all five activities and attempts to provide an overview in the second paragraph, mentioning that the film club remained the most popular while amateur dramatics decreased. However, there are significant inaccuracies in reporting the data. For instance, the student states that the number of people doing martial arts was 'about 36 in 2010 and 35 in 2005 so its decresed in 2005 to only 1', which completely misinterprets the graph values. Furthermore, data points for musical performances and other activities contain confusing or erroneous figures. While the main features are identified, the frequent misreporting of specific values pulls the task achievement score down.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response is divided into paragraphs, starting with an introduction and a brief overview, followed by body paragraphs dedicated to individual activities. However, the logical progression is hindered by poor referencing and a lack of effective cohesive devices. Transitions between sentences feel abrupt and mechanical (e.g., 'in last musical performance...'). Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal organisation of data within the body paragraphs is jumbled, making the text difficult to follow smoothly.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, relying heavily on simple verbs like 'increased', 'decreased', and 'changed'. There are several spelling mistakes throughout the text, such as 'diffrent', 'constatly', 'yhe', 'libble', 'perfomance', 'maked', and 'amateuur'. The student attempts some less common vocabulary items like 'participation', but overall, the lexical range is limited and frequently marred by inaccuracies that reflect a lack of control over word formation and spelling.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0
The student relies on simple sentence structures, and attempts at more complex sentences often result in severe grammatical errors and poor punctuation. There is a complete lack of capitalization at the beginning of sentences and for proper nouns ('melbourne australia'). Sentences often run together without proper punctuation or conjunctions (e.g., 'table tennis increased from 16 participants in 2000 around 20 in 2005 and 2010. and then increaed to 36 in 2015 and than 54 in 2020'). Frequent errors in tense consistency and basic sentence construction cause considerable difficulty for the reader.
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