Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
This line graph illustrates about the number of participants at social centre for their work in Melbourne, Australia between the year 2000 and 2020.
Overall,participation in most activities changed considerably between 2000 and 2020.The Film club shows highest level of number of participants and most popular activity throughout the entire period, while table tennis experienced the most dramatic growth.Thus some experienced an upward trend whereas others remained stable.
Firstly,film club comprised of 64% participants in the year 2000 and its proportion increased about 67% in the year 2020. Conversely, martial arts and amateur dramatics showed fluctuations up and down.However,the martial art constituted of 35% rise in 2010 whereas amateur dramatics exhibit falls in number of participants in the year 2010.On the other hand, table tennis demonstrated as significant trend account for 16% in the year 2010 and workers level exceed up to 55% in the year 2020. Meanwhile, musical performances portray no significant growth in the year 2000 but its workers started to raised in the year 2005 and its ratio revealed 10% to 13% slightly sustained at specific interval of time.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses the task partially and presents an overview with some main trends, yet it exhibits significant inaccuracies in data reporting and unit confusion. For instance, the student mistakenly treats the raw number of participants as percentages, stating that the film club 'comprised of 64% participants' and later that table tennis accounted for '16%' and reached '55%'. While the selection of features covers several key trends, such as the film club being the most popular throughout and table tennis experiencing dramatic growth, the misunderstanding of the vertical axis units prevents full development. To move to a higher band, the response must accurately report the data as absolute numbers rather than percentages, and provide a clearer, more fully extended overview of all notable movements in the graph without data distortion.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response shows some organisation with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs, but it lacks a clear overall progression. Paragraphing is attempted, but mechanical transitions such as 'Firstly' and 'On the other hand' are overused and do not always connect ideas logically. Reference words and cohesive devices are sometimes inadequate or inaccurate, resulting in a slightly disjointed flow between sentences. For example, sentences within the body paragraphs jump between activities without establishing a smooth comparative framework. To achieve a higher band, the writer needs to group related information more logically and ensure that cohesive devices guide the reader seamlessly through comparisons and contrasts without repeating mechanical connectors.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate to convey the general idea of the task. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary items, such as 'dramatic growth', 'fluctuations', and 'significant trend', but these are accompanied by noticeable errors in word choice, collocation, and form, such as 'workers level exceed up to' instead of participation levels rising. Additionally, confusing participants with percentages demonstrates a strain in accurate lexical reporting. Spelling is generally acceptable, but lexical inaccuracies sometimes cause minor confusion for the reader. To improve, the student should expand their range of functional language for describing data trends and ensure precise word choice and appropriate prepositions when discussing statistical changes.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writing demonstrates a limited range of structures, relying on a mix of simple and complex sentences that often contain faulty mechanics. There are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation, including missing articles ('at social centre'), incorrect prepositions, and awkward verb forms such as 'its proportion increased about 67%' and 'its workers started to raised'. Subject-verb agreement issues also appear throughout the text. These frequent errors can occasionally cause difficulty for the reader and distract from the argument. To reach the next band, the student must increase sentence variety while maintaining grammatical control, ensuring correct verb tenses, accurate prepositions within data descriptions, and proper punctuation without run-on constructions.
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