Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
This assigned line chart expound the information about the number of participants social centre melbourne,australia for the period 2000 to 2020
To commencing with australia in film club number of participants is around 65 in 2000 but after that number of participants is decrease is 2010 number of participants is 60 .In 2020 number of participants in film club is almost 68. Adding more martial arts number of participantsis approx 37 but after that line is decline in 2005 number of participants is 30 in 2010 number of participants is 40 martial arts is not stable on one place . In 2020 number of participants is 40. Further more musical performances is start in 2005 and many people is participating in musical performance in 2020 number of participants is around 15
Probing further in the table tennis, around 18 but in 2020 number of paricipants is approximately 55 because many people are love this game. Amateur dramatics number of participants is almost 25 but in 2020 number of participants is 10 because people no intrested in this game
overall , the highest number of participants were recorded in film club, whereas the lowest number of participants was recorded in musical performance
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses the task partially, attempting to outline the trends for the various activities over the twenty-year period. However, the selection of information is inconsistent and contains several inaccuracies when compared with the visual data. For instance, the description of musical performances starting in 2005 is incorrect, as the graph shows them starting at zero in 2000 and 2005 before appearing in 2010. Furthermore, figures are occasionally misreported, such as the statement that table tennis participants were around 18 in 2000 when the chart indicates roughly 16. While an overview is provided at the end, it contains a factual error regarding musical performances having the lowest number, given that amateur dramatics dropped to 6 in 2020. To reach a higher level, the response needs to accurately report the data without discrepancies and provide a more fully developed, coherent summary of the main trends and comparisons.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response shows some organization with an introductory statement and an concluding overview, but it lacks a clear overall progression. The internal structure of the body paragraphs is disjointed, relying on repetitive transitional phrases like 'in 2020 number of participants is' rather than flexible cohesive devices. Paragraphing is rudimentary, with sentences lumped together into a dense block of text instead of being logically grouped by activity or trend. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the mechanical repetition of sentence structures disrupts the flow of information. To improve in this criterion, the writer must ensure logical sequencing between ideas, use a wider variety of cohesive markers naturally, and divide the text into clear, thematic paragraphs.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is limited and minimally adequate for the task. The writer relies heavily on basic, repetitive phrasing, such as 'number of participants' and 'in 2020', which severely restricts the lexical range. There are noticeable lexical errors and inappropriate word choices, such as 'expound' instead of 'depicts' or 'illustrates', 'game' instead of 'activity' or 'sport', and 'no intrested' instead of 'lacked interest'. Spelling errors, such as 'intrested' and 'paricipants', also occur. While the meaning can generally be deciphered, these errors and the lack of less common vocabulary items cause some difficulty for the reader. Incorporating a broader range of synonyms and precise vocabulary relating to data trends is necessary for advancement.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response displays a very limited range of grammatical structures, consisting mostly of simple sentences that are frequently joined incorrectly or left as run-on clauses. Attempts at more complex sentences are largely faulty, such as missing verbs and prepositions (e.g., 'To commencing with australia in film club number of participants is'). Frequent errors in tense usage, subject-verb agreement, and articles are present throughout the text, including 'is decrease', 'is start', and 'many people are love this game'. Punctuation is also weak, with missing capitalisation and commas. These frequent errors cause considerable strain and difficulty for the reader. To achieve a higher band, the writer needs to demonstrate control over a wider variety of sentence patterns and significantly reduce basic grammatical errors.
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