Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The multi-line graph depicts the number of candidates for five various acticivites at a social sector in Melbourne and Australia within time frame of 2000 to 2020.

Overall, film club activity comprised the most preferred compared to the other categories, whereas musical sector was the least chosen by participants in 2000 and 2005.

Regarding to the film club, it recorded more than 60 individuals, making it most popular activity among others. While, a minimal decline was seen in 2010 to 60 participants and slightly rose in 2020, with around 65 people. However, table tennis constituted approximately 15 attendees. There was a noticeable growth in 2010 to 20 participants and it sharply surged till 2020, with 50 members, which was the second highest category.

Turning to the amateur dramatics, it had above 10 contestants. a slight increase in 2005 and dramatically dropped until 2020 to less than 10 players, that was the least preferred activity in 2020. Meanwhile, martial arts represented nearby 25 contributors. A continuous fluctuation was experienced till 2015 and it remained unchanged in 2020, with more than 30 individuals. Last observation of musical performances, it had 0 subjects from 2000 to 2005. A sudden sour was noticed from 2010 to 2020, with more than 10 contributors.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response successfully addresses all parts of the task by providing an overview and reporting the main trends and comparisons for all five activities shown in the graph. For instance, the overview correctly identifies the film club as the most preferred category and musical performances as the least chosen at the start. Key features are selected, such as the sharp surge in table tennis and the zero participation for musical performances in the early years. However, some ideas are underdeveloped or lack precise detail, such as the description of martial arts which misses specific numerical values or endpoints. To reach a higher level, the response should ensure that all reported data points are fully elaborated and connected to clearer overarching comparisons across the entire twenty-year timeframe.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response presents a coherent overall arrangement with clear paragraphing, dividing the introduction, overview, and body details logically. Information is generally organized by category, making the progression of ideas easy to follow. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty, seen in awkward transitions like 'While, a minimal decline...' and abrupt sentence boundaries, such as starting a new sentence with 'However, table tennis constituted...'. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, such as pronoun placement. To improve cohesion, you should employ a wider and more flexible range of cohesive devices and ensure that referencing words link smoothly without disrupting the flow of the sentences.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'constituted', 'fluctuation', and 'contributors'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors, word choice inaccuracies, and spelling mistakes that prevent a higher score, such as 'acticivites' instead of 'activities', 'social sector' instead of 'social centre', and 'sour' instead of 'surge'. Collocations are also occasionally unnatural, such as 'contestants' or 'players' used for drama and table tennis participants. To achieve a higher band, you need to expand your vocabulary range with greater precision, eliminate spelling slips, and ensure that word choices accurately reflect the context of social activities.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures like subordinate clauses and comparative phrases, as seen in 'making it most popular activity among others'. There are some grammatical and punctuation errors throughout the text, including missing articles ('making it most popular activity', 'Last observation of musical performances'), incorrect prepositional patterns ('Regarding to the film club'), and comma splices or fragmented phrasing ('a slight increase in 2005 and dramatically dropped'). Fortunately, these errors rarely impede communication. To move to the next level, you should increase the frequency of error-free complex sentences and maintain tighter control over articles, prepositions, and punctuation.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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