Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given chart illustrates the data about various fields, in which different percentage of people are enrolled at a particular social center in Melbourne, Australia from 2000 to 2020.

Film club is at the top in the list soo far. However there seems a significant increase in table tennis. Musical performances were introduced half decade later and increased gradually.

Film clubs and Martial arts remained same during the two decades. Most importantly amateur dramatics have decreased considerably during two decades, like earliar there were 30 percent participants but in 2020 there were only 5 percent which is a significant backclash faced by this field. Table tennis is the only activity which increased enormously during this period, initially it was at engaging around 15 percent of the players in 2000 but in 2020 there were about 52 percent participants in this sport. Music performances were introduced a half decade later in 2005 and has increased gradually and reached in engaging 15 percents of the participants in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses the main features of the task, noting the dominance of the film club and the significant changes in table tennis and amateur dramatics. However, some aspects are under-developed or inaccurately described. For instance, the data refers to actual numbers of participants, but the student mistakenly frames the figures as percentages ('30 percent participants', '52 percent participants'), which distorts the reporting. Additionally, the overview is rather weak, blending directly into specific details without standing clearly on its own. While the key trends are identified, supporting details for categories like martial arts and musical performances are somewhat limited, which prevents a more thorough and precise evaluation against higher criteria.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement, and the reader can generally follow the progression of information across the different activities. However, the cohesion feels somewhat mechanical and abrupt in places, notably with the disjointed paragraphing and choppy sentence structure, such as 'Film club is at the top in the list soo far. However there seems a significant increase in table tennis.' Referencing and transitions between ideas lack fluidity, and the absence of a proper paragraph break makes the text read as a single, dense block of writing, which disrupts the logical flow and organisational structure.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully conveying basic trends and movements with words like 'increase', 'decreased considerably', and 'gradually'. The student attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'significant backclash', though this collocation is awkward and inaccurate in this context. There are also a few spelling and word choice errors, including 'soo', 'earliar', and confusing absolute numbers with percentages. While these lexical slips do not completely impede communication, they restrict the response to a moderate band level, as greater precision and natural collocation are required for higher scores.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response employs a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as 'Table tennis is the only activity which increased enormously during this period'. There are some grammatical errors and punctuation issues present, such as missing commas in introductory phrases ('initially it was at engaging around 15 percent'), awkward prepositional use ('at engaging'), and tense inconsistencies like 'Music performances were introduced... and has increased'. However, these errors are relatively infrequent and rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to understand the intended meaning without undue difficulty.

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