Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The given line graph illustrates the numbers of participants who participated in different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Overall, the number of participants in film club, martial, table tennis and musical performances are incresed. While the number of participants which represented in amateur dramatic was decrease. However it is noticeable that film club
represented the highest proportion by the end of the period.
At the beginning of the period, the number of participants who participated in film club stood at 7, it's the decreased gradually to 60 and in 2010 before reaching almost 67 in 2020
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5
The response fails to meet the minimum word length requirement, falling significantly short of the 150-word minimum, with 15 words copied directly from the prompt discounted from the total. Furthermore, the task is only partially addressed. While the student attempts an overview and mentions several categories, the selection of data is extremely limited and incomplete. Crucially, the reported figures contain severe inaccuracies, such as stating that the film club started at 7 in 2000 when the chart clearly shows 64, and abruptly ending the text mid-sentence. Ideas are severely underdeveloped, preventing a fully realized response.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0
The response attempts basic paragraphing by separating the introduction, overview, and body details, but the structural progression breaks down quickly. Cohesive devices are minimal and mechanical, relying on basic connectors like 'Overall', 'While', and 'However'. The referencing is unclear and confusing, particularly in sentences like 'the number of participants which represented in amateur dramatic was decrease', which disrupts the flow. Because the text cuts off abruptly, there is no clear overall progression or logical conclusion to the writing.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is very limited and repetitive, with frequent reliance on basic phrasing such as 'numbers of participants' and 'different activities'. There are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices, such as 'martial' instead of 'martial arts' and 'amateur dramatic' instead of 'amateur dramatics'. Word formation and inflection errors are also present, including 'incresed' and 'decrease' used in place of 'increased' and 'decreased'. These inaccuracies demonstrate a restricted range that struggles to convey precise meaning.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The grammatical structures attempted are very limited, consisting mostly of simple and flawed complex forms. There are frequent errors in verb forms, tense usage, and agreement, such as 'the number of participants... are incresed' and 'the number of participants which represented in'. Prepositional and structural patterns are also handled poorly, as seen in 'stood at 7, it's the decreased gradually'. Punctuation is incomplete due to the unfinished final sentence, and grammatical errors cause frequent difficulty for the reader.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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