Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
the film club remained the most popular activity throughout the period table tennis experienced the most significant growth while amateur dramatics declined considerably musical performances also increased whereas participation in martial arts fluctuated slightly in 2000 the film club had approximately 64 participants making it the most popular activity athough this figure fell gradually to around 61 in 2010 it subsequently increased to about 67 in 2020 participation in martia arts fluctuated between approximately 32 and 38 ending at around 37 participants by conte Table tennis showed the most dramatic increase over the period. Its participation rose from approximately 16 in 2000 to 20 in 2005 and 2010, before climbing sharply to around 36 in 2015 and 55 in 2020. Musical performances had no participants in 2000 and 2005, but the number increased to approximately 12 in 2010, followed by 16 in 2015 and 18 in 2020. and a a a
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the task by providing a clear overview and reporting the main features and trends of the various activities shown in the graph. The writer successfully highlights key trends, such as the film club remaining popular, the significant growth in table tennis, the decline in amateur dramatics, and the fluctuations in martial arts. However, some aspects are under-developed or lack sufficient extension. For instance, the data points for martial arts and musical performances are listed somewhat superficially without deeper comparative commentary. To reach a higher level, the response would need to integrate the data more fully, ensuring that all comparisons between categories are sharper and more comprehensively supported by the figures.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
The response demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement and attempts to organise information logically, beginning with a summary sentence followed by specific body details. However, the cohesion is severely hindered by major mechanical flaws, particularly the complete absence of paragraphing, as the entire text runs together as a single block. Additionally, there are abrupt transitions and awkward linking devices, such as starting a sentence with 'by conte Table tennis' and concluding with a string of stray letters ('and a a a'). Referencing and cohesive devices are poorly managed, making the progression of ideas disjointed and requiring the reader to work harder to follow the structure. Improved paragraph breaks and accurate cohesive ties are essential to elevate this aspect.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully conveying basic trends and figures with terms like 'most significant growth', 'declined considerably', and 'fluctuated'. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'subsequently' and 'dramatic increase', which demonstrates a reasonable lexical range. However, there are notable word-form and spelling errors that detract from precision, such as 'martia arts' instead of martial arts, and a minor typo in 'athough'. While these errors do not severely impede communication, they prevent the vocabulary from achieving the flexibility and precision required at higher bands. Greater attention to accurate spelling and word forms is needed for further improvement.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures like time clauses ('In 2000 the film club had approximately 64 participants...') and compound sentences. However, the grammatical range is limited, and there is a complete lack of punctuation throughout the entire text, as sentences run together without periods or commas. This absence of basic punctuation, combined with minor structural slips, represents frequent errors in punctuation control that disrupt the reading flow. To achieve a higher band, the writer must incorporate a wider variety of complex grammatical structures and demonstrate accurate sentence boundary marking and punctuation control.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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