Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-07
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the count of participants for five various activities at specific social centre in Melbourne, Australia between 2000 and 2020.
At first glance, it is clear that the number of participants in the film club were around 65 during 2000, it fell slightly to 60 in 2010 then, again reach to its initial stage after a decade. In 2000, the number of persons who participated in martial arts were about 38, showed a gradual decline to 30 in 2000 and reached to 35 in 2020. Moreover, the number of participants in the amateur dramatics activity were approximately 26 in 2000, which gradually inclined to 29 in 2005 and then substantially decreased to 5 in 2020.
Moving further, the number of participants played table tennis were just around 15 in 2000 and reached 20 in 2005 before showing a dramatic increase to 55 in 2020. There were no one in musical performances from 2000 to 2005, but then marginally escalated to 15 in 2000.
Overall, the number of participants under the film club remained highest throughout the period. However, the amateur dramatics experienced a dramatic increase in the given period. In contrast, the participants under martial arts showed a negligible difference over the period.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
You identify all five activities and include several relevant figures, such as film-club participation staying near 60–65 and table tennis rising from about 15 to 55. However, important trends are misreported: martial arts fell to about 32 in 2005, not 30 in 2000, and musical performances rose to around 18 by 2020, not 15 in 2000. Most seriously, the overview says amateur dramatics increased, although it declined sharply overall, from about 26 to 6. The response therefore gives only a partial and sometimes inaccurate account of the main features. To improve, check each series against the years and make the overview accurately summarise the strongest overall trends and comparisons.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two paragraphs describing data, and a concluding overview. Sequencing expressions such as “At first glance” and “Moving further” help signal progression, and the activities are generally grouped in a readable way. However, the overview comes after detailed reporting and repeats some information without clearly synthesising the main patterns. The paragraph transitions are also somewhat mechanical, while the incorrect year references make the progression through time harder to follow. Organise the body by contrasting stable or fluctuating series with those that changed substantially, and use accurate time markers. A concise overview immediately after the introduction would make the report’s central comparisons clearer.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “dramatic increase,” “gradual decline,” “marginally,” and “remained highest,” so the reader can understand the intended comparisons. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing. Some choices are inaccurate or unnatural, however: “five various activities,” “count of participants,” and “the number of participants played table tennis” do not express the data naturally. “Inclined” is also unsuitable for describing a rise in figures, and “escalated” is awkward in this context. Aim for precise collocations such as “the number of participants,” “participation rose,” and “fell steadily.” This would make your descriptions more natural and exact without requiring more elaborate vocabulary.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses with “which” and “before,” and most of the intended meaning remains understandable. However, errors occur in basic sentence patterns and agreement: “the number … were” should be “the number … was,” while “There were no one” should be “There was no one” or “There were no participants.” Some verb forms and tense choices are also faulty, as in “then, again reach” and “showed a gradual decline to 30 in 2000.” Articles and prepositions are sometimes missing or awkward, for example “at specific social centre.” Practise consistent past-tense reporting and check subject–verb agreement, articles, and complete verb phrases when editing.
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