Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The graph below gives illustrates how the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the changed from 2000 and 2020. Units are meansured number of participants

There is a alomost constant in the film club from 2000 and 2020.

A constant 60 to 70 participants

IN addition There is a constant of martial from 2000 and 2020 over 30 and under 40 participants in 20 years.

morever There is a increase in the participants of amateur dramatics from 2000 and 2020 a rise of units under 30 and over 50 participants

there is a deacreas in dramametly in the table tennis from 2000 and 2020. Units are under 20 and under 10 participants

IN addittoin there is a increase slightly in the musical performances in in the 2005 and 2020 units are undeo 0 over

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response3.0
Coherence and Cohesion4.0
Lexical Resource4.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy4.0
Overall4.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The response identifies several activities and attempts to describe changes, but key trends are repeatedly misreported. Film-club participation was broadly stable, and martial arts fluctuated within the stated range, which are accurate observations. However, amateur dramatics declined from about 26 to 6 rather than rising, while table tennis increased markedly from about 16 to 54 rather than decreasing. Musical performances began at zero in 2000, not 2005, and rose to around 18. There is no clear, accurate overview of the main contrasts. The response is also below the required 150 words: it contains 126 words, with 16 prompt words excluded from the count. To improve, report the major rises and falls accurately and include a concise overview.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to separate observations into short paragraphs and use linking expressions such as “In addition” and “moreover.” However, the information does not progress in a clear, controlled way: the response moves from film club to martial arts, then mislabels the trends for amateur dramatics and table tennis, making the comparisons difficult to follow. Some sentences are fragments, such as “A constant 60 to 70 participants,” and the final point is incomplete. Capitalisation and spacing in connectors are inconsistent (“IN addition,” “morever”), and repeated openings such as “There is” make the organisation mechanical. Grouping the activities by their main trends and using complete sentences would make the report easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses a small set of relevant terms, including “participants,” “increase,” “decrease,” and “constant,” so the topic is generally recognisable. However, vocabulary is repetitive and several word choices or forms are inaccurate, including “meansured,” “alomost,” “deacreas,” and “dramametly.” Phrases such as “a constant of martial” and “a rise of units” are not natural ways to describe the data, while “under 0 over” is unclear. These errors sometimes make the intended trend difficult to understand. Build a more precise range for describing graphs, such as “remained stable,” “fluctuated,” “rose sharply,” and “fell steadily,” and check spelling and collocations before finishing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The response relies mainly on short, simple statements, with little evidence of varied sentence structures. Several sentences are incomplete or lack a clear grammatical relationship, for example, “A constant 60 to 70 participants” and “Units are meansured number of participants.” The opening sentence also contains a faulty construction: “gives illustrates how … for the changed from 2000 and 2020.” There are recurring problems with articles, prepositions, and sentence formation, as in “There is a increase” and “from 2000 and 2020.” Capitalisation and punctuation are also inconsistent. Practise writing complete subject–verb sentences and linking a trend to its time period, for example, “Film-club numbers remained fairly stable between 2000 and 2020.”

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