Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-09
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.0)
The given information is about participants of different activities at one social center of Melbourne, the period of 2000 to 2020.
The participants of martials art are likely growing in same speed,but on the other hand table tennis is growing insanely.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0
The response identifies the topic and makes one relevant comparison: martial arts participation is described as growing steadily, while table tennis rises much more sharply. However, it does not provide an overview of the main patterns across all five activities, and it omits key features such as the film club remaining the most popular, amateur dramatics declining, and musical performances beginning later and increasing. The claim about martial arts growing at the same speed is also unclear and does not capture its fluctuations. The response is substantially below the required 150 words, leaving the task only minimally addressed. To improve, report the overall trends and support them with selected figures and comparisons.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0
The two sentences are connected by a contrast marker, “but on the other hand,” so the reader can see the intended comparison between martial arts and table tennis. However, there is no clear progression beyond this single comparison, and the response lacks paragraphing or a structured sequence for presenting an overview and supporting details. The opening sentence merely introduces the graph rather than guiding the reader through its main features. Develop a simple structure: an introduction, an overview of the most important trends, and a paragraph comparing selected activities over time. Use linking expressions only where they clarify relationships between the data.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
The response uses a few relevant terms, including “participants,” “activities,” and “growing,” and “insanely” conveys that table tennis increased markedly. However, the vocabulary range is very limited, and some choices are unsuitable for a formal data summary. “Insanely” is informal and imprecise; “sharply” or “substantially” would be more appropriate. “Martials art” is also an inaccurate form of the activity name, and “same speed” is vague when describing a trend. Use precise trend vocabulary such as “fluctuated,” “declined,” and “rose steadily,” alongside accurate activity labels and figures.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response contains two short sentences, and the contrast between the trends is understandable. However, the grammatical range is narrow, with no developed sentence structures for comparing changes across the period. The opening phrase “The given information is about participants” is awkwardly constructed, while “the period of 2000 to 2020” lacks a natural preposition and article pattern. In the second sentence, the comma is incorrectly joined to “but” without a space, and the sentence would benefit from clearer punctuation. Practise accurate introductory clauses and comparison structures, for example, “While participation in martial arts fluctuated, table tennis rose substantially.”
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