Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-11
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line graph draws the comparison among the participation in various activities in social center in Melbourne, Australia fromm 2000 to 2020.
Overall, the highest surge is observed in enrollments in tabble tennis whereas the amateur dramatics experienced the sharpest decline.
The number of participants in tabble tennis increased gradully during the first half on the graph and then increased sharply in the next half with the participation increasing from less than 20 to around 60 in 2020. Furthermore, musical performance also experienced continous rise with the highest number of around 20 in 2020.
In addition to that , film club enrollment experienced a gradual increase till 2020 with the participation less than 70 in 20 years. However, marital arts highlts the fluctuating trend over the period with the intrested canidate around 40. In contrast, amateur dramatics declined sharply with a sight increase in 2005 with a candidate around 30 and dramatic decrease with below 10 participants in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You identify the main contrasting trends: table tennis rises strongly, while amateur dramatics declines, and you also mention the growth in musical performances. These are relevant features, and the overview gives the reader a useful sense of the graph. However, some details are imprecise or misleading. Table tennis rises from about 16 to 54, not to around 60, and its early movement is an increase followed by a plateau before the sharp rise. Film-club participation does not increase gradually throughout: it dips slightly before rising to about 66. The martial-arts figures fluctuate around the mid-30s rather than around 40. More precise comparisons and a clearer account of these stages would make the summary more complete and accurate.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, an overview, and paragraphs describing the activity trends. This helps the reader follow the main points, and contrast markers such as “Furthermore” and “In contrast” show an attempt to connect information. However, the body is presented as one long paragraph, so the different series are not grouped as clearly as they could be. Some linking phrases are mechanical or awkward, particularly “In addition to that,” and the relationship between details is occasionally unclear. For example, the film-club and martial-arts trends are joined in the same sentence without a clear comparison. Use separate, logically grouped paragraphs and simpler transitions to make progression more consistent.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use a reasonable range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “sharpest decline,” “fluctuating trend,” “gradual increase,” and “declined sharply.” These choices communicate the broad patterns and show an effort to use task-specific language. However, several spelling errors and imprecise or unnatural expressions reduce accuracy, such as “tabble,” “gradully,” “highlts,” and “interested canidate.” “Enrollments” and “interested candidate” are also not the most suitable terms for people taking part in activities; “participants” is clearer and more consistent. Aim for accurate spelling and natural collocations, and avoid forcing less familiar wording where a straightforward term is more precise.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt a mix of sentence forms, including complex clauses with “whereas,” “with,” and “in contrast,” and most of the intended meaning can be understood. Some grammatical errors remain, however. The opening phrase “the comparison among the participation” has an awkward noun structure, while “the participation increasing” is an incomplete or poorly controlled clause. In “film club enrollment experienced a gradual increase till 2020 with the participation less than 70,” the relationship between the clauses is not grammatically clear. There are also punctuation and spacing problems, such as the space before the comma in “that ,”. Practise building accurate comparisons and trend sentences, and check clause structure and punctuation during revision.
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