Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The graph illustrates the figure of participants for various activites at one centre in Melbourne,Australia from 2000 to 2020.

Overall, the graph shows the counting of persons who play roles in different Arts at one social centre.

In 2000, the number of participants in Ailm club was 64 later on, it increased upto 66 in 2020. Here it was also noticed that, there were 37 persons who participate in Martial arts but there counting remain same after soo many years in 2020.In comparison of that, the number of participants were 26 in Amateur dramatics in 2000 but it was decreased in 2020 and there counting remained 2 only.

Remaing activites show that there were 16 participants in Tabke tennis in 2000 after some time, its number increased upto 54.But there was one activity which was noticed that different participants started to participate in that activity in 2007.Before 2007 there was no participation of any person in Musical performances lat

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the chart’s subject and report several relevant figures, including film-club participation rising from 64 to 66 and table tennis increasing from 16 to 54. You also note the decline in amateur dramatics. However, the overview is vague: “the counting of persons who play roles in different Arts” does not summarise the main trends. Some details are inaccurate or unsupported: martial arts fluctuated around the mid-30s rather than remaining unchanged, amateur dramatics ended at about 6 rather than 2, and musical performances began in 2010, not 2007. The response also stops before completing its final point. Select the clearest overall patterns and report the key comparisons accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response, beginning with an introduction and then moving through several activities. Phrases such as “In comparison” and “Remaing activites show” signal relationships between points. However, the overall progression is difficult to follow because the overview does not establish the main trends, and the body moves from one series to another without a clear grouping or consistent comparison. Some links are awkward or unclear, as in “Here it was also noticed that” and “after some time.” The final sentence is incomplete, leaving the discussion unfinished. Use a distinct overview followed by logically grouped comparisons, and make each sentence complete and clearly connected to the one before it.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses a small set of relevant terms, including “participants,” “increased,” “decreased,” and “in comparison,” so the general subject is usually understandable. However, vocabulary is basic and repetitive, and several spelling and word-choice errors make the account less clear: “activites,” “Ailm club,” “counting,” “Remaing,” and “Tabke tennis.” Phrases such as “play roles in different Arts” and “different participants started to participate” are unnatural or imprecise for describing a graph. Aim for accurate chart language and avoid repeating “number” or “participants” where possible. For example, describe figures as “stood at,” “rose to,” or “fell to,” and use the activity labels exactly as shown.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, and several statements communicate a basic comparison, such as the sentence about amateur dramatics declining by 2020. However, control is inconsistent, particularly in longer sentences. For example, “In 2000, the number … was 64 later on, it increased” joins two independent clauses without suitable punctuation or a conjunction. There are also problems with agreement and verb forms in “there counting remain same” and “persons who participate,” as well as missing or inconsistent articles and punctuation. These errors sometimes make relationships between ideas harder to follow, although the main topic remains recognisable. Practise writing shorter, complete sentences first, then combine them with accurate clauses using “while,” “whereas,” or “although.”

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