Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

This graph illustrate information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social center in australia from 2000 to 2020.

overall, graph shows highest number of participants in film club and stay constant untill 2020. Moreover the lowest number of participants in amateur dramatic almost under ten untill the 2020.

so, in the graph on the top film club in 2000 have over 60 participants but in the end of 2020 remain constant. secondly same as the first one in material art. thirdly, amateur dramatic in 2000 approximately under 30 but in 2010 it goes up and reaches to almost 50. Fourthly, the table tennis goes down over the time and lowest in graph in 2020 at only 7. in the last, musical performance starts in 2005 goes little up in 2010 and after 5 years also slightly high, then at the end in 2020 ends at 19 participants.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response identifies the chart’s subject and attempts an overview, but several central trends and figures are misreported, so the main features are not reliably summarised. Film-club participation is described as constant, although it dips slightly before rising to about 66. More seriously, amateur dramatics falls from around 26 to 6; it does not rise to almost 50 in 2010. Table tennis rises sharply to about 54, rather than declining to 7, and martial arts fluctuates around the mid-30s rather than remaining constant. Musical performances are broadly described as increasing, though they begin in 2010, not 2005. The response is also 11 words below the 150-word minimum. Focus on accurate overall trends and select a few supporting figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organisation: an opening sentence is followed by an overview and then a sequence of details, and signposts such as “overall,” “secondly” and “in the last” show an attempt to guide the reader. However, the progression is not consistently clear. The overview is followed by a list-like account, and “so” and “thirdly” do not establish meaningful comparisons between activities. Some transitions also introduce inaccurate information, making the relationships between points harder to follow. Use separate paragraphs for the overview and key details, then group activities by their trends—for example, rising, falling or fluctuating. More precise linking and reference would make the organisation easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses a limited but relevant set of chart vocabulary, including “participants,” “reaches,” “starts” and “ends,” so the general topic is usually understandable. However, several word choices and forms are inaccurate or repetitive: “material art” for “martial arts,” “amateur dramatic” for “amateur dramatics,” and “slightly high” for a slight increase. “Remain constant” is also an imprecise description of a series that changes. Repeated sequencing words such as “secondly,” “thirdly” and “fourthly” add little meaning. Build a more accurate range for describing trends and comparisons, and check activity names carefully. Phrases such as “fluctuated,” “declined steadily” and “rose sharply” would help convey the data more precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response communicates its general purpose, but grammatical control is uneven and sentence structures are mostly simple. Errors occur in agreement and verb forms, as in “This graph illustrate” and “film club in 2000 have,” and articles and sentence construction are often missing or faulty: “overall, graph shows” and “in the end of 2020 remain constant.” The long final sequence of activity descriptions also relies on loosely connected clauses, with punctuation and tense control needing attention. Practise forming complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and use consistent past-tense reporting, such as “participation rose” or “the figure remained.” More accurate simple sentences should come before attempts at longer comparisons.

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