Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-14
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The graph beneath illustrates the members of participants for various activities at one social center in Melbourne, Australia between 2000 to 2020.
Overall, the Flim club and Martial arts face upward trend in social center throught the graph.While the Musical performances And Amateur dramatics face downward trend in graph. Meanwhile the Table Tennis face upward trend in graph.
The number of participants in Flim club were same 65% between 2000 to 2020, while the participants in table tennis were low in 2000 it was 15% and in 2020 it increased to 52%.
Futhermore the number of participants in Martial arts had some flucations in 2000 it was 30% and in 2020 it increased to 47%. whereas the participants in amateur dramatics in 2000 was
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5
You identify the chart’s subject and mention several relevant series, but the response only partially summarises the data. The overview incorrectly says musical performances declined; they rose from zero to about 18, while amateur dramatics did decline. The film-club figure is described as unchanged, although it dipped slightly before rising, and the martial-arts figure of 47 in 2020 is substantially above the chart’s approximate value of 36. The final sentence is unfinished, leaving the amateur-dramatics trend unreported. The response also contains 124 words, below the required 150, which limits the detail provided. To improve, give an accurate overview of the contrasting trends and support it with a few reliable comparisons across the period.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an introduction is followed by an overview and then some details. Linking expressions such as “Overall,” “Meanwhile,” and “Furthermore” help signal relationships between points. However, the progression is weakened by contradictory trend statements and by the final sentence stopping at “in 2000 was,” so one comparison is left incomplete. Some transitions are also awkwardly attached, as in “While the Musical performances And Amateur dramatics face downward trend… Meanwhile the Table Tennis…”. Use separate, complete paragraphs for the overview and key details, group related trends together, and ensure each comparison is finished before moving on. This would make the information easier to follow.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The response uses a small range of relevant chart vocabulary, including “participants,” “upward trend,” “fluctuations,” and “increased.” These choices show an attempt to describe change rather than simply list activities. However, several word choices and spelling errors reduce precision: “members of participants” is unnatural, “Flim” is misspelled, and “face upward trend” does not fit the intended meaning. The repeated use of “participants” and “increased” also limits variety. Aim for accurate collocations and a wider set of trend verbs, such as “rose,” “declined,” “remained stable,” and “fluctuated.” Check spelling and capitalisation, especially for activity names, before submitting.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple statements and more complex comparisons, including a sentence beginning “While” and one using “whereas.” However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to interpret. For example, “The number of participants in Flim club were same 65%” has problems with subject–verb agreement, article use, and sentence structure; “between 2000 to 2020” uses an incorrect preposition pattern. The overview also contains incomplete or poorly joined clauses, and the final sentence is unfinished. Practise complete sentences with accurate subjects and verbs, and use patterns such as “from 2000 to 2020” or “between 2000 and 2020.” Punctuate each sentence clearly.
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