Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

summaries the detail by option and documenting the major qualities , and create differentiation where connected .

overview, the number of participants described the activity in the year and how much participant.In this detial, the fil club, material art, amateurs grantics,table tennis activity and last one musical performance all of above detail activity in years and participant.

In this paragraph, in 2000 start partocipant 15% ita a small change in 2005. in 2010 no big change actually,in 2015 is small change 8% activity participants. in 2020 individual small change only 5% participants activity.in 2005 small change 5 to 15 % activity

. its a muscical performance. 25% amateur dramatic participant in 2005 and other year no large cahnges.in 2020 small change 5% percant participant.15% jump participant in 35% and 55% percant jump in 2020 its a heigh cahnge the table tennis.Martial arts is zigzag cahnge in middle 35% around all of above .Fim club is most highest jump in 2000 to 2020 of the year 65 to 70 percant.

in conclusion, its all of the above most highest participanys in film club.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the five activities and recognise two important features: film club remains the most popular, while table tennis rises substantially. However, the account only partially reports the graph’s main information, and several figures or trends are inaccurate or unclear. For example, film club changes from about 64 to 66 participants, not from 65 to 70, and its movement is fairly stable rather than a “highest jump.” Table tennis rises from roughly 16 to 54, while amateur dramatics falls from about 26 to 6; these trends are mentioned but not clearly tracked across the years. The overview is also vague. Select the strongest overall patterns, then support them with accurate start and end figures and clear comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is an attempt to organise the response with an opening, an overview, a body paragraph and a conclusion, and the activities are generally kept within the topic. However, the information is not arranged in a clear progression: the discussion jumps between years and activities, and some statements are difficult to connect, such as “15% jump participant in 35% and 55% percant jump in 2020.” Linking and reference are also unclear, with repeated phrases such as “in 2020” and “all of the above.” Build the body around meaningful groups—for example, rising activities and declining or stable ones—and describe each trend in chronological order. Use clear sentence boundaries and linking phrases to show comparisons.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some task-related vocabulary, including “participants,” “zigzag change,” “jump,” and “highest,” so the reader can identify the general subject. However, the range is basic and repetitive, and frequent spelling and word-choice problems make several points hard to understand. Examples include “fil club,” “material art,” “amateurs grantics,” and “muscical performance”; these obscure the chart’s activity labels. Phrases such as “small change” and “most highest jump” are also imprecise or unnatural for describing data. Learn the exact category names and use a small set of accurate trend expressions, such as “remained stable,” “fluctuated,” “rose sharply,” and “declined steadily,” rather than repeating “change.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The response attempts to communicate changes over time, but grammatical control is very limited and errors frequently make relationships between figures unclear. Many clauses lack a clear subject or verb, as in “in 2010 no big change actually,” while “the number of participants described the activity in the year” does not form a clear sentence. Tense, articles, agreement and sentence construction are also unreliable, and punctuation often joins or separates ideas incorrectly. Most statements are fragments rather than complete sentences, so the reader has to infer the intended meaning. Practise simple, accurate comparison structures first—for example, “The figure for table tennis rose from 16 in 2000 to 54 in 2020”—then add a few controlled complex sentences.

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