Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020 the Film club activities went very influently and highest ranking from the period of 2000 to 2020 . The martial arts activities goes good but the graph shows us sometimes plummet and soars in the graph in the period of 2000 to 2020 . The Amateur dramatics activites are fine but the graph tells us their work is good from 2000 to 2005 because the graph climbs up but from 2005 to 2020 the graph falls down . The Table tennis Activites from 2000 to 2005 going slightly high in the graph then 2005 to 2010 graph gradually decreases but in 2010 to 2020 was very good work and cantant going up . The Musical performances are going up in the graph from 2005 to 2010 then it stables

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify all five activities and make some relevant observations, such as film club remaining the highest and amateur dramatics declining after 2005. However, the response gives no clear overall summary of the main changes, and several descriptions are vague or inaccurate: table tennis rises strongly from 2010 to 2020 rather than simply being “good work,” while musical performances continue to rise through 2020, not merely “then it stables.” The chart’s key comparisons and figures are largely missing, so the task is addressed only minimally. The response is also 21 words below the 150-word minimum; the nine words copied from the task prompt are excluded from the count. Add a concise overview and support each main trend with accurate data.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response follows a recognisable activity-by-activity order, which gives the reader a basic route through the chart. However, it is presented as one long paragraph, with no separate overview or clear grouping of the main trends. Repeated phrases such as “the graph shows us” and “from 2000 to 2020” make the progression mechanical, while several links between time periods are difficult to follow. For example, the table-tennis sentence moves from a slight rise to a decrease and then a sharp increase without clearly distinguishing the years or explaining the overall pattern. Use an overview paragraph followed by two organised detail paragraphs, and connect comparisons with precise time references.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some chart-related vocabulary, including “climbs up,” “falls down,” “gradually decreases” and “going up,” so the reader can recognise the general direction of several trends. However, the vocabulary is basic and repetitive, and some choices are inaccurate or unnatural for describing data. “Went very influently,” “good work” and “stables” do not express the trends clearly; “plummet and soars” also exaggerates the martial-arts fluctuations. There are spelling errors in “activites” and “cantant,” and repeated use of “graph” limits variety. Build a more precise set of trend verbs and nouns, such as “fluctuated,” “rose sharply,” “declined steadily” and “remained stable,” and use them with the correct subject.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to describe changes across time and use some longer sentence patterns, including contrasts introduced by “but” and time clauses beginning “from 2005 to 2020.” Basic meaning is often recoverable, but control is inconsistent. For example, “the martial arts activities goes” has a subject–verb agreement error, and “the Musical performances are going up … then it stables” shifts awkwardly between plural and singular subjects and verb forms. Several sentences also lack clear punctuation or have incomplete grammatical connections, making the relationships between periods harder to understand. Practise forming accurate past-tense descriptions of completed chart periods, and check agreement, sentence boundaries and punctuation. More reliable simple sentences would improve clarity before you attempt longer structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.