Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-18
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The given bar chart elucidates information about numbers of participants by activity [redacted phone] . The chart compares different categories and present the data in number or percentage . Overall it is clear that there are noticeable differences among the categories shown in the chart . According to the chart the first main activity is Film club is 2020 and that percentage is 65 . The next activity is martial arts in 2020 that percentage is 2015 is low and 2010 is almost high and 2005 is low and 2000 is high . The next acitivty is Amateur dramatics in 2020 is low and 2005 is very high that percentage is better . The next activity is Table tennis in 2020 that percentage is very low in 2010 and 2005 . The next activity is Musical performances in 2020 that percentage is 2015 low 2010 low and 2005 is almost low . The bart chart compares the different categories in the chart .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response identifies the chart’s general subject and names all five activities, but it reports very little usable information about the trends. Several descriptions are inaccurate or unclear: table tennis is said to be “very low” in 2020, although it rises sharply to about 54, while film club remains high throughout rather than being simply “the first main activity” in 2020. The account of martial arts gives vague labels such as “low” and “almost high” instead of explaining its modest fluctuations. There is no clear overview of the main changes, such as table tennis’s strong growth and amateur dramatics’ decline. To improve, summarise the overall patterns first, then support them with accurate comparisons and selected figures.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0
The response has a basic sequence, moving through the activities one by one, and it includes an opening and a concluding sentence. However, the ideas are not arranged into a clear report: the repeated phrase “The next activity” creates a list-like progression, and the final sentence merely repeats that the chart compares categories. Connections between years and trends are also difficult to follow, particularly in the martial arts description, where several years are mentioned without a clear comparison. Grouping the activities by pattern—for example, stable or fluctuating figures versus rising or falling figures—and using separate overview and detail paragraphs would make the information easier to follow. Use linking expressions to show contrast and change rather than repeating the same sentence frame.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary is sufficient to identify the chart’s topic and activities, and terms such as “participants,” “categories,” and “percentage” show an attempt to describe data. However, the range is limited and several choices are inaccurate or repetitive. “Bar chart” is used even though the visual is a line graph, and “percentage” is inappropriate because the figures are participant numbers. Phrases such as “very high,” “very low,” and “almost high” do not communicate precise trends, while “the percentage is better” is unclear. Spelling errors, including “acitivty,” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise set of trend expressions, such as “remained relatively stable,” “rose sharply,” and “declined steadily,” and use them with the correct chart terminology.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response attempts simple statements and a few longer constructions, including the opening sentence and “Overall it is clear that…”. However, sentence structures are very limited, and frequent errors make several descriptions hard to interpret. For example, “the first main activity is Film club is 2020” has an unclear sentence structure, while “The next activity is martial arts in 2020 that percentage is 2015 is low” does not form a clear grammatical relationship between the years and the figures. There are also problems with articles, agreement, and punctuation, including spaces before full stops and missing commas. Practise writing complete subject–verb sentences and use comparative clauses, such as “Table tennis rose from… to…,” to express changes clearly.
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