Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The line graph illustratres the data about people who participated in various activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia between 2000 and 2020.

Overall, the film club was seen with the highest number of particpants while table tennis was at second number.Martial arts flactuated time to time however a drastric declined was noticed in amateur dramatics. Muscical intstruments participants were increased.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The response identifies the graph’s subject and gives a brief overview, noting that the film club had the most participants and that amateur dramatics declined. However, it is far too short to provide the required summary: the response is 54 words, 96 short of the 150-word minimum, and eight words copied from the prompt are excluded from that count. Several claims also need greater accuracy: table tennis was not consistently second, as martial arts had more participants until 2015; and “musical instruments” is not the activity shown—the label is musical performances. Include key figures and changes across the period, such as table tennis rising sharply to 54 and amateur dramatics falling to 6.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic overall structure: an opening sentence introduces the graph, followed by an overview beginning with “Overall.” This gives the reader a simple route into the response. However, the answer ends after the overview, so it has no developed body paragraph or logical progression through the data. The ideas in the overview are also crowded together, with little punctuation or linking—for example, “second number.Martial arts” runs two points together. To improve, organise the main trends into a body paragraph or two, group related activities, and use clear sentence boundaries and transitions to show how the figures change over time.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some relevant task vocabulary, including “line graph,” “participants,” “fluctuated,” and “declined,” and the general meaning is usually recoverable. However, spelling errors are frequent enough to distract, including “illustratres,” “particpants,” “flactuated,” “drastric,” and “Muscical.” Some expressions are also unnatural or imprecise: “at second number” should be replaced with a natural comparison such as “ranked second,” while “musical instruments participants” misnames the graph’s category, which is musical performances. Use accurate activity labels and standard trend language, such as “rose steadily,” “fell sharply,” and “remained relatively stable,” to describe the data more precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response communicates its basic message through mostly simple sentence patterns, including “The line graph illustrates…” and “Overall, the film club…”. There is an attempt at a more complex contrast with “however,” but the sentence is not punctuated effectively, and the following clause is awkwardly formed: “a drastic declined was noticed.” The final sentence, “Musical instruments participants were increased,” also has an unclear grammatical structure and an incorrect passive construction. Sentence boundaries are missing in “number.Martial,” and the overview contains inconsistent sentence construction. Practise accurate past-tense descriptions of trends, for example, “Participation in table tennis increased,” and build a wider range of clear, correctly punctuated sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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