Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The number of the of the firm club in the had been decreased from the year 2000 to the year 2010 but after that it has slightly been incread from 2010 to 2020 to a position above which it was in the start. The graph for the martial is quite zigzag that shows the interest of people has been falling and rising in the field of martial arts. It shows zigzag curves through out the period. The graph line for the amateur dramatics showed a rise in the start but eventually it had started going downwards to a lower position at the end of the year 2020. Table tennis has kept rising frrom from lower postion to a higher position which shows the interest participants taking in the sport. For the musical performance the number of participant kept increasing from year to year although it is introduced in 2005 but still the participants has been increased.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the general direction of several series, including the decline in amateur dramatics and the strong rise in table tennis, so the response is related to the chart. However, the account is minimal and does not give a clear overview of the most important comparisons. Some details are inaccurate: film-club participation fell only slightly before rising, rather than being described clearly as a decrease followed by a slight increase; amateur dramatics rose at the beginning, but its later fall to about 6 is not quantified. The claim that musical performances were introduced in 2005 is incorrect: the chart shows no participants in 2000 and 2005, with the series beginning to rise by 2010. Include key figures and compare the final positions of the activities to make the summary more informative.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response moves through the activities one by one, which gives it a basic organising principle, and phrases such as “after that” and “at the end” indicate changes over time. However, it is presented as one continuous paragraph, with no distinct overview or clear grouping of the main trends. Several sentences repeat the same point, particularly the description of martial arts as “zigzag” and then as showing “zigzag curves through out the period.” Connections between ideas are also sometimes unclear, as in the final sentence, where the introduction date and increase in participants are joined awkwardly. Organise the response into an overview and detail paragraphs, and use concise comparisons rather than repeating descriptions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “increased,” “rising,” “lower position,” and “participants,” and “zigzag” conveys the fluctuating pattern of martial arts. However, the range is limited and several choices are inaccurate or unnatural, which can make the meaning difficult to follow. “Firm club” appears to be a mistaken label for “film club,” while “the martial” is incomplete and “interest participants taking in the sport” is not a natural expression. Spelling errors such as “incread,” “frrom,” and “postion” also reduce clarity. Aim for precise terms such as “number of participants,” “fluctuated,” and “rose steadily,” and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to connect ideas in longer sentences using “but,” “although,” and time clauses, showing some effort to go beyond simple statements. However, these structures are often faulty, and errors frequently make the sentences difficult to read. The opening, “The number of the of the firm club in the had been decreased,” contains a confused noun phrase and an incorrect passive construction. There are also problems with tense and agreement in “the participants has been increased,” and the final clause beginning “although it is introduced in 2005” is not grammatically well formed. Use straightforward active constructions such as “Film-club attendance fell slightly, then rose,” and check articles, verb forms, and subject–verb agreement before adding complex clauses.

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