Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

This given line graph illustrates the information about the number of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Overall this line graph represents that martial arts and other are keep growing while Amateur dramatics are countinously falling after five years.

Now if we talk about musical performances it start from 2005 but in 2020 it realy give more participants. In the case of table tennis it became almost stable from 2000 to 2010 but it also give a maximum rise to the number about 55 .

now if we summerize rest of all martial arts and film club almost remains stable.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify several relevant patterns, including the sharp rise in table-tennis participation and the decline in amateur dramatics, and you note that film club and martial arts were broadly stable. However, the overview is incomplete and partly inaccurate: martial arts did not keep growing overall, and musical performances began in 2010, not 2005. The response also gives very little supporting detail and omits important comparisons, such as film club remaining the most popular activity and table tennis rising to second place by 2020. At 93 words, it is 57 words below the required minimum; this limits how fully you can summarise the main features. Develop a clear overview and support it with accurate figures across the period.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has a basic sequence: an introduction, an overview, and comments on individual activities. This gives the reader some sense of how the information is organised. However, the progression is not consistently clear, and the final sentence groups film club and martial arts together without explaining their different levels or changes. Linking phrases such as “Now if we talk about” and “In the case of” are repetitive and conversational rather than helping to compare data precisely. The short paragraphs also leave several ideas under-connected. Organise the report into a clear overview followed by comparisons of the main trends, using concise links such as “By contrast” or “Meanwhile” where they clarify relationships.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “participants,” “stable,” “falling,” and “rise,” so the main subject is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several expressions are imprecise or unnatural, such as “give a maximum rise to the number” and “rest of all.” Repetition of “line graph” and “participants” also restricts variety. Spelling errors in “countinously,” “realy,” and “summerize” are noticeable and reduce accuracy. Aim for precise trend language and natural collocations, for example, “increased sharply,” “declined steadily,” and “remained relatively stable.” Check spelling carefully and avoid informal framing phrases when describing data.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt a few different sentence patterns, including a contrast with “but,” and the opening sentence communicates the topic. However, grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes make relationships unclear. For example, “martial arts and other are keep growing” has faulty verb construction and agreement, while “it start from 2005” lacks the correct verb form. “Amateur dramatics are countinously falling” also has an incorrect verb form, and the sentence beginning “now if we summerize” is not properly punctuated or capitalised. Most sentences rely on simple structures, with little accurate complex grammar. Practise forming past-tense descriptions and subject–verb agreement, then use a few controlled comparisons, such as “While X rose, Y remained stable.”

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