Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph depicts the number of participants in various activities at a social centre in Melbourne a city of Australia.It demonstrates the interest of people in different activities. There are few activities which remains consistent.However there were also those activities which undergoes a lot of fluctuation.

Since year 2000 people seems to have an almost consistent interest in film clubs and martial arts. Because these two occupations were remained in decent range from [redacted phone].The Film club was the most dominant occupation as it had more audience then any other activites which are shown here.However the martial arts also had a lot interest of people but not as much as film club.

The main fluctuation was in table tennis .People seemed to lose interest in table tennis after 2005.But the game changed after 2010. It went up after 2010 conciding with martial arts in 2015. The amateur arts declined a great deal after 2005.The least interested occupation was musical performance.Altough after 2005 people started participating in it and it crossed amateur dramatics after 2015.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify several important patterns: film-club participation remains highest, table tennis rises strongly, and amateur dramatics declines. The comparison that table tennis “concid[es] with martial arts in 2015” is supported by the figures, and you note that musical performances eventually overtake amateur dramatics. However, the overview is not fully clear: describing the activities as “consistent” and then saying there was “a lot of fluctuation” does not distinguish the stable series from the major changes. Some details are also inaccurate or imprecise: table tennis did not lose participants after 2005; it rose from about 16 to 20 and then remained level until 2010. Musical performances began in 2010, not after 2005. A clearer overview and more accurate trend reporting would strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure, moving from an introduction to comments on the more stable activities and then to changing trends. This gives the reader a basic progression, and linking expressions such as “However” and “after 2010” help connect points. At times, though, the organisation is difficult to follow because trends are grouped without a clear comparison or sequence. For example, the table-tennis discussion shifts from losing interest to rising and then to its relationship with martial arts, while the musical-performances point is added at the end without a clear link to the other declining series. Use a concise overview paragraph, then group the remaining details by trend, and make references such as “it” unambiguous.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing a graph, including “declined,” “fluctuation,” “dominant,” and “participating.” These choices show an attempt to vary language rather than simply repeat “went up” or “went down.” However, several expressions are imprecise or unsuitable for describing activities and their participants: “occupations” and “audience” do not accurately describe the graph, and “the game changed” is vague. There are also spelling errors, including “activites,” “concid[ing],” and “Altough,” which reduce accuracy. Aim for precise terms such as “activity,” “participants,” “rose,” and “fell,” and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast with “However” and a time clause beginning “Since year 2000.” Meaning is generally recoverable, but errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries occur across the response. Examples include “activities which remains,” “people seems,” and “these two occupations were remained”; the verbs should agree with their subjects, and “were remained” is not a valid construction. Several sentences also run together, as in “Melbourne a city of Australia.It demonstrates,” while missing spaces after full stops make the punctuation harder to read. Practise accurate present-tense descriptions and use full stops or commas to separate clauses. More consistently controlled sentences would improve clarity.

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