Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

This graph illustrates the information on the numers of participants ( film club, martial arts, amateur dramatics,table tennis, and musical performances) in Melbourne and Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Overall, the film club was the most popular activity throughtout the period. While the table tennis saw the most dramatic growth in this period. In amateur dramatics was only the activity experience a sharp growth or decline.

Moreover, In 2000

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

You identify the chart’s subject and give two relevant overview points: the film club remained the most popular, and table tennis grew substantially. However, the response is incomplete: it stops at “Moreover, In 2000” and gives no supporting figures or comparisons across the five activities. The statement that amateur dramatics was the only activity to “experience a sharp growth or decline” is unclear and inaccurate; it declined, while table tennis and musical performances also rose notably. The required minimum of 150 words is not met, which contributes to the very limited coverage. To improve, complete the report and support the overview with key changes, such as table tennis rising from about 16 to 54 and amateur dramatics falling from about 26 to 6.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response, with an introductory sentence followed by an overview, and “Overall” signals a shift to the main features. This gives the reader a starting structure. However, the report has no developed body paragraph and ends abruptly with “Moreover, In 2000,” so ideas do not progress to a complete summary. The sentence fragment “While the table tennis saw the most dramatic growth in this period” is also not connected smoothly to the preceding sentence. Use a clear sequence: introduction, overview, then one or two paragraphs comparing the main trends. Connect related points in complete sentences and avoid beginning a new point unless you finish it.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use several relevant terms for describing a graph, including “participants,” “period,” “most popular,” and “dramatic growth.” These choices show some awareness of the language needed for Task 1. However, the range is limited by the short response, and a few word choices or forms are inaccurate: “numers” is misspelled, “in Melbourne and Australia” misstates the location, and “experience a sharp growth or decline” does not express the trend clearly. “Throughtout” is also misspelled. Build a more precise range for describing movement and comparison, such as “rose steadily,” “fell sharply,” “remained relatively stable,” and “increased from … to …”. Check spelling and use the chart’s location accurately.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts both a simple introductory sentence and a contrast using “While,” showing some effort to vary sentence forms. However, several structures are incomplete or faulty. “While the table tennis saw the most dramatic growth in this period” is a dependent clause without a main clause, and “In amateur dramatics was only the activity experience…” has an incorrect sentence pattern and verb construction. The final “Moreover, In 2000” is unfinished. Capitalisation after commas is also inconsistent. These errors make parts of the message difficult to follow. Practise writing complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and combine contrasts into a full structure, for example: “While table tennis rose sharply, amateur dramatics declined.”

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