Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

the graph depicts the information about members of diifferent activites at one social center in melbourne and australia for the period between 2000 to 2020.

overall table tennis member was increase dramatically and amateur dramatics was falling gradually , In 2005 musical performance center was opened and rise steadily

To begin with film club there was nomajor changes in member in 2010 it was slighlty decreades had 60 members after 2010 it was rise steady and 65 particiapnts at 2020 ,while martial arts member increase after 2005 and continuosly decreased after 2005 ,moving towards table tennis member was steady in 2000 and 2005 after 2010 grew dramatically (50 particpant) in 2020 amateur dramatics fall after 2010 to 0 particpant in 2020

after 2000 new social center musical performance was opened in 2005 and grew significantly had 15 participants at 2020

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify several important overall patterns, especially the sharp rise in table-tennis participation and the decline in amateur dramatics, and you include some figures for the film club and other activities. However, the account is incomplete and contains notable inaccuracies: musical performances began in 2010, not 2005, and amateur dramatics fell to about 6 participants in 2020, not zero. The description of martial arts is also unclear and contradictory, while the overview does not compare the activities’ relative levels. The response is 10 words below the required minimum, which limits the opportunity to report the main features fully. Add a clearer overview and accurately describe the key changes across the full period.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response, beginning with an introduction and an overview before moving through individual activities. Some linking expressions, such as “To begin with” and “moving towards,” help signal progression. However, the body is largely one long, difficult-to-follow sequence, with several activities and time periods joined together without clear sentence boundaries. The order also shifts abruptly, and the repeated use of “after” makes relationships between dates confusing, particularly in the martial-arts description. Separate the information into clear paragraphs and use one sentence for each activity or meaningful comparison. More precise links between trends would make the progression easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses some relevant task vocabulary, including “participants,” “dramatically,” “steadily,” and “decreased,” so the reader can recognise the general subject and trends. However, the range is limited and several word choices or forms are inaccurate, such as “member” for participant numbers, “diifferent activites,” and “slighlty decreades.” Phrases such as “musical performance center was opened” also do not clearly describe the chart, which shows participation in an activity rather than the opening of a venue. These spelling and collocation problems sometimes make the meaning harder to understand. Aim for accurate trend language and vary expressions for increases, decreases, and stability.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to combine information using clauses and time expressions, but sentence structures are mostly simple or run together, and errors are frequent enough to obscure some comparisons. For example, “film club there was nomajor changes in member” lacks a clear grammatical structure, while “after 2010 it was rise steady” has an incorrect verb form. The martial-arts sentence is especially difficult to interpret because its time references and clauses are not clearly connected. Punctuation and capitalisation are also inconsistent, with long stretches lacking full stops. Practise writing short, complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, then add accurate past-tense forms such as “rose,” “fell,” and “remained stable.”

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