Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-22
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The graph picture is related about Melbourne city of Australia wich have number of participants of different activities time period 2000 to 2010. The most important is film club and least important is musical performance. It show the people are mostly interest in film club and people not gave interest in musical performance. Perfomance are changed to spend the time in past people take interest in other things.In 2005 people was more interest in table tennis and it's demand high untill 2010. After this the ratio was high of marital art people most take interest this become many clubs.The film club are become after 2015 to 2020 The comparison between musical competition and film club very low abd very high show a slight difference .The demand is vey high film club as compare in past music performance. The one hand side is music table tennis maritalart other side is filmclub.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 3.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response identifies the film club as the most popular activity and musical performances as initially the least popular, and it attempts to compare activities over time. However, it misstates the period as 2000 to 2010, although the graph runs to 2020, and several descriptions do not match the data: table tennis rises strongly after 2010, while martial arts fluctuates around the mid-30s rather than becoming the main interest. The claim that musical performances remain least popular is also not true by 2020, when amateur dramatics has fewer participants. Overall, the report only minimally summarises the graph and gives little accurate coverage of its main trends. A clearer overview and correctly selected comparisons are needed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5
There are a few attempts to connect ideas, such as “After this” and “In 2005,” but the response does not develop a clear sequence from an overview to supporting details. The discussion jumps between film, musical performances, table tennis and martial arts, and the final contrast, “The one hand side is music table tennis maritalart other side is filmclub,” is difficult to interpret. Several sentences also run together without clear punctuation, making relationships between points unclear. Organise the report into a brief overview followed by logically grouped comparisons, and use linking phrases only where they accurately show a relationship. Clear sentence boundaries and references to the years would make the progression easier to follow.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The response uses some task-related vocabulary, including “participants,” “demand,” “comparison” and “interest,” so the reader can recognise that it concerns activity popularity. However, the range is limited and several choices are inaccurate or awkward, such as “the graph picture is related about,” “least important” for least popular, and “musical competition” for musical performances. Spelling errors such as “wich,” “Perfomance” and “marital art” also reduce clarity. Aim for precise terms for trends and participation, and check spelling and collocations. For example, describe numbers as rising or falling and say that an activity “attracted” a certain number of participants rather than that people “gave interest.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response mainly relies on simple statements and shows limited control of sentence structure. Errors in verb forms, agreement and articles occur frequently, as in “wich have number,” “people was more interest,” and “The film club are become.” Some sentences lack a clear grammatical structure, particularly “The comparison between musical competition and film club very low abd very high show a slight difference.” Punctuation is also insufficient, with several ideas joined together. These problems sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to follow. Practise forming complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and use consistent past or present forms when describing the graph. More accurate simple sentences should come before attempts at longer comparisons.
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