Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The graph represents the number of participants involve in activity at social center in Melbourne, Austrailia between 2000 and 2020. The graph shows a different type of activites. The activities are Film club, Martial arts, Amateur dramatics, Table tennis and Musical performances.

The number of attendees at musical performances. This activity was started in 2005

and then the number of attendees goes to almost 20 in 2020. The number of people who come for table tennis are 15 to 50 between 2000 and 2020. The number of artists in the amateur dramatics activity are declining by time. The participants in martial arts are 35 in 2000 and then these number up and down in coming year it stops at 34 in 2020. The participants that involves in film club activity are 65 then this number is increased to 68 with the change of time.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify all five activities and report several broad trends, including the decline in amateur dramatics and the rise in table tennis. However, the response only minimally summarises the graph: it has no clear overview of the main comparisons, and some figures or timing are inaccurate. Musical performances began in 2010, not 2005; table tennis rose from about 16 to 54, rather than 15 to 50; and film-club participation ended at about 66, not 68. The martial-arts figures also fluctuate around the mid-30s, but the final value is about 36. The response is 144 words, below the required 150. Add a concise overview and select accurate key figures to develop the summary.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response follows a basic sequence, introducing the graph and then mentioning the activities one by one, so the reader can identify the general subject. However, ideas are not arranged into a clear report structure: there is no distinct overview, and the activity details are presented as a run of separate statements rather than grouped comparisons. The sentence fragment “The number of attendees at musical performances” interrupts the flow, while repeated openings such as “The number of…” and “The participants…” make the writing feel list-like. Use an introduction, an overview of the main trends, and one or two detail paragraphs. Linking comparisons—for example, contrasting the sharp rise in table tennis with the fall in amateur dramatics—would create clearer progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough basic topic vocabulary to identify the activities and describe change, including “declining,” “increased,” and “up and down.” This gives the reader a general understanding of the graph. However, the range is limited and some word choices are imprecise or repetitive: “number of artists” does not accurately describe participants in amateur dramatics, and “these number up and down” is not a natural way to describe fluctuation. There are also spelling errors in “Austrailia” and “activites,” and “social center” is less appropriate than the task’s “social centre.” Build a small set of accurate trend phrases, such as “fluctuated,” “rose steadily,” and “fell sharply,” and use “participants” consistently.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, and several clauses communicate the intended trend, such as “The number of people who come for table tennis are 15 to 50 between 2000 and 2020.” However, the range remains limited, and frequent errors in sentence formation and agreement sometimes make the meaning difficult to follow. “The number of attendees at musical performances. This activity was started in 2005” begins with a fragment, while “the number of people … are” has subject–verb disagreement. In “these number up and down,” the verb pattern is incomplete, and “the participants that involves” also has incorrect agreement. Practise complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and use past-tense forms consistently when describing the period.

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