Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The graph illustrate the numbers of participants for different activities over twenty years at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Overall, it is fact that the film club were more popular than other activities. where, Martial arts experienced fluctuations. Table tennis and musical performances showed steadily incline. Conversely, amateur dramatics seem to be decline.

In 2000 to 2010, Film club show gradual decline 64 to 60 again rose to 66 participants until 2020. While, martial arts

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the main overall pattern that the film club had the highest participation and note contrasting trends, including growth in table tennis and decline in amateur dramatics. However, the report is only a brief, incomplete response: it contains 69 words, below the required 150, and the final sentence stops after “While, martial arts,” leaving that series and the remaining data unreported. Some details are also unclear: the film-club figures are given as falling from 64 to 60 and then rising to 66, but the period of the final rise is not clearly described. Develop a complete overview and compare the key changes across all five activities, using selected figures to support them.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response into an introduction, an overview and a detail paragraph, and the overview signals contrast with “Conversely.” These features give the reader some sense of the intended structure. However, the response does not progress into a complete account: the final paragraph breaks off after “While, martial arts,” and there is no concluding development of the comparisons. Some links are also awkward or unclear, such as “Overall, it is fact … where,” and “In 2000 to 2010” does not clearly establish the time period being discussed. Use complete paragraphs with one clear purpose each, and connect comparisons with accurate, simple linking phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is sufficient to identify the chart’s subject and several trends, with relevant terms such as “participants,” “fluctuations,” “gradual decline,” and “steadily incline.” This shows some range beyond basic labels. However, several word choices or forms are inaccurate or unnatural, including “it is fact,” “showed steadily incline,” and “seem to be decline.” These errors make parts of the overview less clear and limit precision. Aim for standard trend collocations such as “remained the most popular,” “increased steadily,” and “declined,” and use the same clear vocabulary consistently when describing each activity. The short response also gives little opportunity to demonstrate a broader range.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and more complex structures, including a contrast introduced by “Conversely” and a sentence beginning “While.” However, grammatical control is inconsistent. For example, “The graph illustrate” has subject–verb disagreement, and “the film club were” does not agree with the singular activity name. The fragment “While, martial arts” is incomplete, while “In 2000 to 2010” and “Film club show gradual decline 64 to 60” show problems with prepositions, tense and sentence construction. These errors sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. Practise complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, maintain past tense for the historical data, and check agreement and punctuation before finishing.

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