Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph ilustrates the data of number of participants in five different events from 2000 to 2020 .

Overall, there were 5 events icluding film club , martial arts , amateur , table tennis and music performances .

Firstly , partipant in music performances were nill from 2000 to 2005 suddenly they rise slightly to 10 after that there was a slight increase in number of participant . Secondly the number of participant in table tennis almost 15 in 2000 and slightly they increased to 17 and then there substancial rise in figures from 17 to 50 in 2020 .In addition , the participants of amateur dramatics were 26 in 2000 increased to 29 later decreased to 20 in 2010 after that consistently falls to almost 5 in 2020

Furthermore , participant of martial arts were second highest and there was little fluctuation in fgures from 2000 to 2020 and the partipants of fim club were the highest from the begining which was 65 till 2020 and there was a a very slight fluctuation .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify all five activities and report several important patterns: film club remains the largest, table tennis rises markedly, amateur dramatics declines, and musical performances begin at zero. These observations show a relevant response to the graph. However, the overview is not clearly separated from the details, and some figures or trends are imprecise: table tennis is about 16 in 2000 and 54 in 2020, rather than approximately 15 and 50; musical performances reach about 12 in 2010 and 18 in 2020, but these stages are not clearly reported. The statement that film club had “a very slight fluctuation” is broadly accurate, though its rise after 2010 could be made clearer. Select the main comparisons and summarise them accurately before giving supporting figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic sequence, moving from musical performances and table tennis to amateur dramatics, then martial arts and film club. Connectors such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” “In addition” and “Furthermore” help signal this order. However, the paragraphing and progression are limited: the opening repeats the list of activities rather than giving a clear overview, and several trends are crowded into one long paragraph. Some linking phrases feel mechanical, while “after that” is repeated without always making the time sequence easy to follow. Use a distinct overview paragraph, then group the rising activities together and the stable or declining ones together. This would make comparisons easier to follow and reduce the impression of a list of separate observations.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant trend vocabulary, including “increased,” “decreased,” “fluctuation” and “rise,” so the reader can generally understand the changes being described. However, the range is limited and several choices or forms are inaccurate, such as “nill,” “substancial rise,” “figures” where “numbers” would be more natural, and “participants of amateur dramatics.” Repeated use of “slight” and “number of participant” also makes the description less precise. These noticeable spelling and collocation problems restrict clarity and control. Build a small set of accurate graph-description phrases, such as “remained stable,” “rose sharply,” and “the number of participants,” and check spelling and word forms before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts to combine ideas using time clauses and contrast, for example, “after that there was a slight increase” and “later decreased to 20 in 2010.” However, sentence structures are mostly simple or joined by “and” and “after that,” and attempts at longer sentences often contain errors. Examples include “partipant in music performances were nill,” where the subject and verb do not agree, and “the participants of amateur dramatics were 26 in 2000 increased to 29,” which lacks a clear grammatical connection between the two actions. Missing articles, inconsistent punctuation and run-on sentences also affect readability. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and use shorter, complete sentences before adding more complex comparisons.

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