Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The graph illustrates the some information on the number of enterence of different activities at 1 social centre in melbourne, australia for the duration 2000 to 2020.

This graph illustrates 5 major activities Australia for the period of 2000 to 2020. first one is is the the film club, second is the material arts, third one is amateur dramatics and second last activities is the table tennis and last show this graph is the musical performances.

First one is the graph is film club, film club demand is very high in all time and most people participate in all time in Melbourne, Australia, In 2000 people participants almost 64 persent and 2005 people participants almost 63%, in 2010 people participants almost 61% and 2015 this demand is high and almost 65 persent people participants last one 2020 this demand is high and aproximately 65%. Second one is the most people participants in the material arts in 2000 is 38%

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response identifies the chart’s subject and names all five activities, and it gives some figures for the film club. However, it reports only a small part of the data: the discussion stops midway through martial arts and does not describe the other activities’ trends or provide an overall summary. Some details are also inaccurate or unclear: film-club participation is given as percentages, although the chart shows participant numbers, and the 2000 martial-arts figure is stated as 38 rather than about 36. The task therefore receives only minimal coverage, with no clear overview of the main changes, such as table tennis rising sharply while amateur dramatics declines. Focus on the most important trends and compare the series accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to introduce the chart and then discuss activities in sequence, so the reader can recognise the intended topic. However, the response does not develop a coherent report: the second paragraph largely repeats the introduction, and the final paragraph ends abruptly after beginning the martial-arts description. Repeated wording such as “First one” and “this graph illustrates” does not guide the reader through a clear progression of information. Paragraphing is present, but ideas are not arranged into a complete overview followed by organised comparisons. A clearer structure would group the main trends—for example, rising participation, falling participation, and relatively stable figures—and use concise links between those points.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses a small set of relevant terms, including “participants,” “activities,” “demand,” and the activity names, which makes the general subject recognisable. However, vocabulary is basic and repetitive, and several word choices or forms are inaccurate: “enterence” is not the appropriate term, “material arts” should be “martial arts,” and “people participants” is an awkward repeated phrase. “Demand” is also not a precise way to describe the number of people taking part. Spelling and capitalisation errors, including “persent” and “melbourne,” further limit clarity. Use standard chart language such as “the number of participants,” “rose,” “fell,” and “remained stable,” and check spelling of key labels.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The writing relies mainly on simple sentence patterns, with limited control of longer structures. Errors are frequent, and some sentences are difficult to follow, as in “first one is is the the film club” and “in 2000 people participants almost 64 persent.” There are also problems with articles and sentence construction in the opening (“the some information” and “at 1 social centre”), as well as inconsistent punctuation and capitalisation that disrupt sentence boundaries. The meaning can sometimes be inferred, but the repeated errors reduce accuracy and clarity. Practise forming complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, for example, “The film club had about 64 participants in 2000,” and use consistent past-tense reporting for the historical figures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.