Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-11-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Many people claim about the fact that competition in all part of our life is good, while others think that we should work together. In my opinion, competition between two or more people can be helpful to reach our goals, but sometimes it can lead to several negative results.
As a matter of fact, children socialize ever since their childhood to rival with other young people. This approach can accompany them not only until the school, but until the adulthood. Moreover, as I have mentioned, rivalry has positive effects, such as it can help you achieve your purposes. Every time they receive the results of the tests in school, comparison begin subconscious and make them feel to get better next time.
However, as I see it, competition can cause negative affects as well. Everyone has various capabilities to the different activities, therefore one reach worse attainment somewhere of their life, it can cause negative results, such as conflicts. Furthermore, to be against with someone is a large stress source. No one should compare themselves to the others, whereas this attitude can lead to self-assessment disorder, which is an absolutely disadvantageous behavior.
To sum up, competing with others has far more drawbacks, than cooperate with our fellows, talking about workplace, school or daily life.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
You present a relevant position: competition can help people reach goals, but it can also have negative effects. You also discuss both sides to some extent, using school tests as an example of how rivalry may motivate students and mentioning stress and conflict as possible harms. However, the discussion of cooperation is very limited: the essay does not explain how working together benefits people or give a concrete example of cooperation. Your conclusion says competition has “far more drawbacks,” which is stronger than the balanced view in your introduction, and this shift is not explained. The response is also 37 words below the required minimum, leaving too little space to develop the ideas. Explain both views more fully and keep your position consistent.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, a paragraph presenting benefits, a contrasting paragraph on drawbacks, and a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “However,” and “To sum up” help signal the direction of the discussion. The main limitation is that progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear. For example, the move from children learning to rival to test results and comparison is not fully explained, while the final paragraph introduces a stronger judgement without showing how it follows from the earlier discussion. Some references, including “this approach” and “this attitude,” could identify their meaning more precisely. Develop each paragraph around one clear point and connect the example directly to it.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use a reasonable range of topic-related vocabulary, including “competition,” “rivalry,” “achieve your purposes,” “conflicts,” and “stress source.” These choices make the general subject clear, and you attempt some less common expressions. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “socialize … to rival,” “worse attainment,” “negative affects,” and “self-assessment disorder.” These can make the intended meaning less precise, particularly in the discussion of the effects of competition. Aim for natural combinations and check whether a word expresses the idea you intend; for example, distinguish “effects” from “affects” and use established phrases such as “academic performance” or “psychological stress.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “while,” “as,” and “whereas.” The overall meaning is generally understandable, but some grammatical errors remain in sentence construction, agreement, and prepositions. For instance, “comparison begin” needs subject–verb agreement, and “one reach worse attainment” has an incorrect verb form and an unclear clause structure. In “No one should compare themselves to the others,” the pronoun reference is also awkward. These issues do not usually prevent the reader from following your main points, but they reduce accuracy. Practise checking each sentence for a clear subject and verb, correct agreement, and complete clause structure, especially in longer sentences.
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