Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Competition is crucial in every field of life to get succes and status. It is claimed that, some people argues of cooperation intead of competition others think is needed. Although botviews has it's own merits but I think having competition is necessary to attain perfection.

Firstly, the people that are against competition say that competition leads to jealousy that hurdles in productivity. People start degrading others rather than focusing on their own goals. Furthermore, they claim that, competition makes a person selfish and it erases basic emotions like helping others to get their work done. They always want to win the race and avoid cooperation with other members.

On the other hand, the point of view of others is that competition at work place, schools and at other fields is important because if there is no competition people start missing their goals. Moreover, they claim that for getting success you have to be competent and fight with others to attain perfection. Productivity can only be increased if some one is competition and others try to reach it. Successful people always make competition around them so that they try more to attain success.

In my opinion, people should have a race so that they try to win and ultimately get successful life.

In conclusion, people should retain healthy competition around themselves at work place in order to get perfection but they should avoid the competition that can become dangerous and make people their enemies.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You discuss both perspectives and state a clear preference for competition, especially in the introduction and conclusion. The response also recognises a useful qualification: competition should be healthy rather than hostile. However, the discussion is only partly developed. The concerns about jealousy and selfishness are listed but not illustrated, while the case for competition relies mainly on repeated claims that it improves productivity and leads to success. Your own opinion would be more convincing if you explained when cooperation is essential and supported your view with a specific example. The response is also 7 words below the required minimum, so it does not fully meet the task’s length requirement. Develop the ideas with reasons and examples rather than repeating the same general point.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, your opinion, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “Firstly,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the broad direction. However, progression within the paragraphs is limited because several sentences repeat the idea that competition produces success or productivity. Some links are also awkward or unclear, such as “Productivity can only be increased if some one is competition and others try to reach it.” The opinion paragraph is very brief and could connect more clearly to the discussion of both sides. To improve, organise each body paragraph around one main claim, explain it, and add a relevant example; use linking expressions only where they clarify the relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “cooperation,” “jealousy,” “productivity,” “selfish,” and “healthy competition.” These choices make the general subject clear, and phrases such as “attain perfection” show an attempt to use more formal language. However, the range is limited and several expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, which sometimes makes the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “fight with others to attain perfection” and “make competition around them” do not express the intended ideas naturally. There are also noticeable spelling and word-form errors, including “succes,” “intead,” and “botviews.” Build a more precise range of collocations and check spelling carefully; for instance, explain that competition can “motivate people to improve” rather than saying it makes them “fight with others.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a concession in “Although both views have their own merits…” and clauses introduced by “because” and “so that.” This shows some range, but complex structures are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make parts of the response difficult to read. Examples include “some people argues,” where the subject and verb do not agree, and “competition leads to jealousy that hurdles in productivity,” which lacks a clear grammatical structure. Other problems include missing or incorrect articles and punctuation, as in “at work place” and “It is claimed that, …”. Aim first for accurate sentence patterns: check subject–verb agreement, use complete clauses, and avoid placing commas between a reporting phrase and its clause. Then extend sentences with subordinate clauses you can control.

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