Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-11-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people believe that competition is a good part in individualts life while others argue that we should stay together without competing. This essay will discuss both views before explaining why I agree more with the the first view.

Supporters of the first view believe that, competition is the best way to bring our best version out for the world to show. For example, if you run a race to win it, then only you can push yourself to do more. By doing this, you can see what is you capability and what you can do if you really want to achieve something. As a result, your confidence will reach a peak and you can dare to do anything in your life, such as getting promotion at job, getting a better result in the exam and doing the best things in everyday life.

On the other hand, others argue that stay humble and supportive is the better way of living life. This is mainly beacause, the more you get competitive, the less you can get others feeling. Alongside competetiveness, a soft persion may convert into a egoistic person. Moreover, it has some health concer as well. For example, a focused and competetive person may have to sleep late. Consequently, it hampers their health and sleep cycle. So thats why, most people consider this concept as a worst thing in our society. However, in my perspective, I support the concept of competetiveness, because in the first growing and mordern life if we want to maintain the pace with the world everybody should be competetive.

In conclusion, despite being competetive has several drawbacks, it can be beneficial at times.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the discussion and make your position clear: you support competition, especially in the introduction and the final body paragraph. The examples of racing, exam results and promotion are relevant, and you also explain possible effects of competition on empathy and health. However, the two views are not developed equally. The benefits are mostly asserted—for instance, that confidence “will reach a peak”—without explaining when competition produces this outcome or acknowledging limits. The cooperation side is also framed mainly as a warning about competitiveness rather than showing how cooperation benefits people. Develop each view with a clearer explanation and a specific example, then make your comparison and opinion more fully reasoned.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. Transitions such as “On the other hand,” “Moreover,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the discussion. However, some links feel mechanical, and the progression within paragraphs is not always smooth. In the second body paragraph, the points about empathy, egoism and sleep are placed together but their relationship to cooperation is not fully explained. “So thats why” also repeats the cause-and-effect link already signalled by “Consequently.” The conclusion is brief and does not restate the reasoning behind your position. Use clearer links between each claim and its explanation, and ensure each paragraph develops one central line of thought.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “competitive,” “supportive,” “confidence,” and “health.” There are also attempts at more expressive phrasing, such as “push yourself” and “maintain the pace with the world.” However, the range is limited and several spelling, word-form and collocation errors are noticeable, sometimes making the reader pause: “individualts,” “competetiveness,” “soft persion,” and “health concer.” Some phrases are also unnatural, including “a good part in individualts life” and “the first growing and mordern life.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise terms such as “personal development,” “mutual support,” and “workplace advancement” would help express your ideas more clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, using clauses with “if,” “because” and “while,” as well as cause-and-effect structures. Most of the meaning remains understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “others argue that stay humble and supportive is the better way” needs a grammatical subject such as “being humble and supportive”; “what is you capability” has incorrect word order and possessive form; and “despite being competetive has several drawbacks” does not form a correct clause after “despite.” There are also article and punctuation problems, such as the comma after “believe that” and “a egoistic person.” Practise accurate clause construction and review articles, possessives and punctuation while retaining your attempts at complex sentences.

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