Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-11-10
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
These days, some people debate that competition at work, school and daily life is good while others think that cooperation is better rather than competing against one another, this essay is going to discuss both views and give my insight.
Firstly, competition is one of the basis of human existence, it is innate and it starts from birth. Competition helps individuals to be up and doing and not relaxed wherever they find themselves and makes tasks achievable for example in schools, students are put under pressure to compete against each other to get a high score of which a reward is given at the end of the term. In as much as it helps motivate students to study and pass exams, it has its downsides. Students can be put under pressure to meet up and if they end up not achieving the required grade, they may end up depressed or can make them have low self esteem and not believe in themselves.
Meanwhile, cooperation on the other hand is essential at work, school or daily life as it helps things to be run smoothly and make an easy life for everyone. For example in healthcare, cooperation is essential as it aids the smooth running of the wards, like the involvement of the multidisciplinary team helps to ensure that effective care is rendered to patients and also helps to promote speedy recovery.
In my view, in as much as competition can be good, cooperation is better as it doesn't make anyone tensed or under pressure. Relying on each other is better because as the saying goes, no one knows it all.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You address both sides of the question and state a clear preference for cooperation in the final paragraph. The discussion of competition includes a relevant school example and recognises both motivation and possible emotional costs; the healthcare example also supports the value of cooperation. These points make the response relevant, but they are not developed equally: the benefits of competition are explained more fully than its drawbacks, while cooperation is mainly illustrated through one workplace setting. Your opinion that cooperation avoids pressure is stated, but would be more convincing if you acknowledged when healthy competition can also be useful and explained why cooperation should still take priority. Extend the reasoning behind each example to make the discussion more balanced and persuasive.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, a paragraph on competition, one on cooperation, and a concluding opinion. The sequence of ideas is generally easy to follow, and transitions such as “Firstly” and “Meanwhile” help signal the shift between views. This meets the lower-band expectations and shows some features of stronger progression. However, several links feel mechanical or repetitive, particularly “In as much as” and “on the other hand,” and the opening sentence joins several complete ideas with commas. The competition paragraph also moves quickly from benefits to drawbacks without a clear transition. Use more varied, precise linking and divide complex points into clearer sentences; this would make the progression smoother and cohesion less noticeable.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
You use an adequate range of vocabulary to discuss the topic, including “innate,” “under pressure,” “self esteem,” “multidisciplinary team,” and “speedy recovery.” These choices help communicate relevant ideas, and the healthcare example uses some topic-specific language. At times, however, word choice and collocation are imprecise or informal: “one of the basis” does not express the intended idea naturally, “meet up” is unsuitable in this context, and “give my insight” is less idiomatic than a direct statement of your position. Repetition of “helps” and “competition” also limits flexibility. Aim for more precise academic phrasing and check common word partnerships, while retaining the clear, relevant vocabulary you already use.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional and subordinate clauses, as in “if they end up not achieving the required grade.” Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical and punctuation errors reduce control. The opening sentence is a comma splice, joining several independent clauses without suitable punctuation. There are also agreement and article problems in “one of the basis,” and the sentence beginning “Students can be put under pressure” shifts awkwardly from “they” to “can make them.” The final paragraph repeats a similar clause pattern, limiting variety. Use full stops or conjunctions to separate complete ideas, check subject–verb and pronoun consistency, and practise a wider range of accurately controlled sentence structures.
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