Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-07-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

It is an eminent practice that people compare themselves with society. Every individual tries their utmost to surpass the superior one and set a new bar for others to achieve. To some extent it is a good thing to develop a sense of challenge but it also have some negative aspects sometimes. So some people believe to halt this and create harmony by motivating each other rather can planting thorns in each other ways. In my opinion it is better to help each other and create a sustainable environment.

Firstly, each human being is unique. Everyone has distinguish attributes and creating a subject of inferiority and superiority is an unethical practice. It is better to understand each other capabilities and solving problems together. This results in a peaceful community where everyone is respected. For example, in Japan everyone is regarded as same and there is no discrimination on behalf of their success and it is visible that Japan is among the successful countries in world.

Secondly, Competition often results in poor mental health and damaged self esteem. Particularly in school going children, they are often discriminated on behalf of their exam scores. The teenager who had hidden potential may have scored better marks but is judged by fellows and sometimes even by teachers. This gives rise to depression and stress. For example, according to recent news in Pakistan, teenagers are widely judged on their poor academics. Some cases even reveal mental torture being done on students and the outcome of this issue ends up in suicide.

Therefore, the competition should not be developed instead of this people should become a mean of a helping hand for fellows. Also, the students should not be judged instead institutes should run off-school programmes to improve the academics of affected children.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant, particularly the discussion on mental health and the impact of competition in educational settings. However, the development is somewhat uneven; while the second body paragraph provides a specific example from Pakistan, the first body paragraph's reference to Japan is a bit vague and lacks depth. To reach a higher band, ensure that the supporting examples are more thoroughly explained to fully illustrate how they relate to the broader topic of competition versus cooperation.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, each with a clear focus. The progression of ideas is generally easy to follow. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'rather can planting thorns' (which appears to be a typo for 'rather than') and the transition 'Therefore, the competition should not be developed instead of this'. Improving the variety and precision of linking words would enhance the flow. Referencing is generally clear, but some sentences feel slightly disjointed due to the limited range of cohesive markers used.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'eminent practice', 'sustainable environment', and 'distinguish attributes' (though 'distinguishable' or 'distinct' would be more accurate). Some word choices are slightly unnatural or incorrect, such as 'run off-school programmes' or 'mean of a helping hand'. While these errors do not impede communication, they indicate a need for more precise collocation and a wider range of academic vocabulary to reach the next level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'it also have some negative aspects' (subject-verb agreement), 'everyone is regarded as same' (missing article), and 'on behalf of their success' (incorrect prepositional phrase). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are minor issues with sentence construction. While the meaning is always clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and correct preposition usage will significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.