Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-07-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Competition has become an integral part of everyone's life in current times. There is an ongoing debate concerning the competition in person's life. while some people argues that it has a good impact on one's life. Whereas, other believes that one should work with cooperation than competing against other. This essay will contend that although, team work is essential, but, competing can help one to reach it's peak efficiency more easily.
The proponents of the former view argues that competition play's a crucial role in person's life. This can be attributed to attaining the highest level of the life in terms of skill, ability and knowledge. For instance, an employee can work on it's highest efficiency while competing with colleagues in an intention to get higher increment and bonus - which is indeed beneficial for both the employee as well as the host company. Thus, it can be considered as a positive approach for anyone.
Conversely, the advocates of the later view believes that team work and cooperating with other can be more beneficial. This can be linked to the fact that one can perform higher when works in group. For example, working as a team can help the company to achieve targets more easily and in short term. Therefore, groupwork are considered to have benefits.
As per my perspective, the more view can be considered more viable than latter, as it has more merits than demerits such as, in groups leader is the one who is given more attention. Although, one should not ignore the flip side of it and should take any decision accordingly.
On the way to conclude, I reaffirm my statement that the former viewpoint is more convincing than the latter.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The essay addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal position. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention that competition leads to efficiency and cooperation leads to group success, these points are not fully extended with deep analysis or nuanced examples. The conclusion is brief and the explanation of your own perspective in the fourth paragraph is slightly confusing, as it is unclear which view you are referring to as 'the more view'. To improve, ensure each body paragraph provides a more thorough exploration of the 'why' and 'how' behind your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices like 'conversely' and 'for instance' to link sentences. However, some transitions are mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the fourth paragraph where the reference to 'the more view' is ambiguous. Additionally, the punctuation around your conjunctions (e.g., 'although, team work is essential, but,') is incorrect, which disrupts the flow of your writing. Improving the variety and accuracy of your linking words will help your ideas connect more naturally.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'integral part', 'proponents', and 'viable'. However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'attaining the highest level of the life' and 'in short term'. Some words are used incorrectly, such as 'later' instead of 'latter'. While your vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning, you need to focus on more precise word choices and standard collocations to move into the higher band scores.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'some people argues', 'competition play's', 'groupwork are') and the misuse of possessive pronouns (e.g., 'it's peak efficiency' instead of 'its'). Additionally, there are several punctuation errors, particularly with the unnecessary use of commas after conjunctions like 'although' and 'while'. These errors are noticeable and occur frequently, though they do not generally impede the reader's understanding of your main points.
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