Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-07-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
In today's contemporary world, most of the people encourage competition in various fields like school and work due to its undeniable merits, whereas other people rejects this notion and say that cooperation is more indispensable than competition. In my perspective, both these approaches play pivotal role in overall development of an individual. This essay will discuss both the views and leading by an effective conclusion in the upcoming paragraphs.
To commence with, competition has an array of benefits in regular life of the communities. At work, most of the employees feel more productive themselves, when they are competing individually with their colleagues. For instance, when they handle a task individually, they don't need permission of any group to make their decision and when they succeed in their task, they take pride of it and it, also, boost up their confidence and creativity. Moreover, distinct researches are in favor of competition at schools in several activities such as quiz, debates and other competitions among pupils.
On the other hand, sometimes people face several obstacles, while dealing with the difficult circumstances. In this case, they are keen to take help and cooperation from their friends and colleagues. For example, most of the employees believe that they can yield more fruitful results, while dealing with tough situations and tasks, when they are working in groups.
To recapitulate, although competition is crucial for enhancing personal abilities and various skills of an individual, but with the assistance of cooperation, it can yield more prosperous and beneficial results, especially in difficult tasks. Therefore, it should be encouraged with the healthy competition.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The essay addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion in the introduction. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention that competition boosts confidence and cooperation yields fruitful results, these points could be expanded with more specific, real-world examples rather than general statements. The conclusion is a bit abrupt and does not fully synthesize the two views as effectively as it could. To reach a higher band, ensure that each body paragraph provides a deeper exploration of the 'why' and 'how' behind your arguments, rather than just stating the benefits.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'On the other hand', and 'To recapitulate' to guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical or repetitive. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'when they succeed in their task, they take pride of it and it, also, boost up their confidence'. Improving the flow between sentences and using a wider variety of linking words would enhance the overall coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey your ideas, including terms like 'indispensable', 'pivotal', and 'fruitful'. However, there are some issues with word choice and collocation. For example, 'most of the people encourage competition' is slightly unnatural; 'many people advocate for competition' would be better. Similarly, 'boost up' is informal and redundant. You attempt to use less common vocabulary, but the precision is inconsistent. Focusing on collocations and avoiding informal phrasal verbs will help you move into a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors throughout the text. For instance, 'other people rejects' (subject-verb agreement), 'leading by an effective conclusion' (incorrect participle usage), and 'distinct researches' (research is an uncountable noun). Additionally, there are punctuation errors, such as the unnecessary commas in 'and it, also, boost up'. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct usage of articles and uncountable nouns.
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