Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In this modern era, education plays an important role in every person life. The advocates of this view believe that competition at work and school and daily life is better thing. Nevertheless, people should try to cooperate more than competing against each other. This essay I will discuss both the views and give my own opinion before conclusion paragraph, reasons for my inclination are articulated in following paragraphs.
On the one hand , why competition is important at work , school , daily life because many people can develop unique information at these places. To explain, majority of human being who are showing their own ability , skills talents at these place . These place also boost confidence, hard work and dedication if people are competing other human. To cite an instance, in the UK majority of students who are participant at school quiz competition.
On the other hand, people should try to cooperate more rather than competing against each other because one person cannot achieve goal by single hand . At job place many employee who are working single hand in their life but they can help with each other better way to problem quickly. At school students are encouraging group activities they can develop their teamwork , leadership communication skills when they have to cooperate more. To cite an examples, many students have encouraged more drama activities because they can learn important skills at school.
In my opinion, although competition at work, school, daily life is important because people boost their confidence and enhance knowledge .When people should cooperate more they can learn new skills from employee , classmate .
In conclusion, there are several reason why competition is significant because providing new information . However if students work to gather they can develop communication leadership skills.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The essay addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, meeting the basic requirements of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is limited. For instance, the argument for competition is vague, relying on general statements like 'develop unique information' rather than specific, well-explained points. Similarly, the examples provided, such as the 'UK school quiz competition' or 'drama activities', are underdeveloped and lack sufficient detail to fully support the claims. To reach a higher band, you need to expand your arguments with more logical reasoning and concrete examples that clearly illustrate how competition or cooperation functions in the mentioned environments.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' are used, but the internal flow within paragraphs is disjointed. For example, the transition 'To explain, majority of human being who are showing their own ability' is grammatically broken and lacks a clear logical link to the previous sentence. Additionally, the conclusion is repetitive and does not effectively synthesize the main points discussed. Improving the variety and accuracy of linking words would significantly enhance the flow of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is generally basic and repetitive. You frequently use simple terms like 'good thing', 'important', and 'people'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'achieve goal by single hand' (should be 'achieve goals individually') and 'at job place' (should be 'in the workplace'). While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of a wider range of vocabulary and the presence of errors in word formation prevent the essay from achieving a higher score. You should focus on learning topic-specific collocations related to education and the workplace.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. There are consistent issues with article usage ('in the UK majority of students'), subject-verb agreement ('many employee who are working'), and sentence structure (e.g., 'This essay I will discuss both the views'). Complex sentence structures are attempted but are often inaccurate, such as 'When people should cooperate more they can learn new skills'. The majority of sentences contain errors, and the range of structures is limited. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would be a good starting point for improvement.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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